


Angelus Of Lux Lucis

by AlexGrey2018



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 2 character pov, Action & Romance, Angst, Bonds, F/M, Love Magic, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Old Magic, Scenes of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-29 11:14:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 28,432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20081287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexGrey2018/pseuds/AlexGrey2018
Summary: A pendant filled with an ancient magic has the power to change everything. But will it be for better or worse? Can one ever forget their past misdeeds? Can the lonely find love? Can new relationships be formed in a broken world?The main part of this story takes places after the Battle of Hogwarts but with changes to the canon of the original JKR story.Hermione/Snape romance and adventure.Short chapters for easy pick up/leave reading.





	1. Prologue - Cruciatus , poena quod a matris diligo (Torture, pain and a mothers love)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. The story I tell here is my own invention, and it is not purported or believed to be part of J.K. Rowling's story canon. This story is for entertainment only and is not part of the official story line. I am grateful to Ms. Rowling for her wonderful stories about Hogwarts, for without her books, my story would not exist.

Prologue - Cruciatus , poena quod a matris diligo (Torture, pain and a mothers love)

Hermione's screams echoed throughout the dungeon.  
The sound was so heart-breaking that every single one of the prisoners below had tears in their eyes as they stood powerless.  
"We've got to do something!" growled Harry.  
"There's nothing we can do, Harry" said Luna, her usual dreamy voice sounding flat and empty.  
There was a loud 'pop' from the back of the dungeon.  
"Harry Potter, sir! So good it is to see you! Dobby is here to save Harry Potter and his friends!"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Please, just let me die" she whispered. "Please, no more".  
Silent tears rolled down Hermione's face. She had learnt to stop screaming. The unadulterated joy in Bellatrix Lestrange's face every time she screamed was pure evil and even her fellow death eaters turned their heads as Bella laughed with glee at the young witch's agony.

Severus Snape however did not look away. He desperately wanted to, she was a child for Merlin's sake! He stood in the corner of the ballroom in Malfoy Manor and kept his expression as impassive as he could. He silently pleaded with the Hogwarts protégé to remain strong. Bellatrix's Cruciatus curses were legendary. Her victims would beg for death, those who did survive (like the Longbottom's) were mere shells, their minds shattered.  
One by one the death eaters left the ballroom on some pretext or another until only Hermione, Bellatrix and Snape remained.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"We can't just leave her here, Dobby!" hissed Ron. "She's family!".  
"Dobby will return to save Mr Wheezy's family" said Dobby earnestly.  
With another loud 'pop', the dungeon was empty.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Bella" drawled Snape, "I do not think the girl can tell you anymore, we are wasting time".  
"Oh, come on, Severus" wailed Bellatrix, licking her lips lavishly. "I want to play!".  
Snape took a deep breath and gave the death eater his most disparaging stare.  
"You think the Dark Lord wants to wait while you 'play'? You show him no respect, Bella!"  
Bellatrix had the decency to look suitably admonished.  
"Severus, you know I will do anything for my Lord!".  
"Then leave the girl and let us away!". 

It took all of Severus' will to remain in character. In his time as Voldemort's right-hand man and Dumbledore's spy, the ex-potions master had seen more than his fair share of torture, pain and even death. Somehow though, the torture of young Miss Granger chilled him right to the bone.  
The next few moments seemed to happen in slow motion.  
His admonishment of Bellatrix Lestrange had meant to ensure that Miss Granger would be left, hopefully to be rescued by Potter and Co. once the Manor was empty.  
Severus never expected what happened next....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Severus is right" whispered Bellatrix, menacingly, her cold lips almost touching Hermione's ear. "I have no use for you now, you filthy mudblood".  
She stepped back and raised her wand high above her head.  
Hermione looked at her ex-potions master, her eyes wide in a silent plea.  
Severus looked at Bellatrix and in that moment everything changed.  
As an accomplished legilimens he was used to reading situations and reacting in a heartbeat. He was used to making split second decisions under pressure and in the last seven years he had never once put his cover in jeopardy, not even that night on the astronomy tower...  
He threw himself at Hermione at the exact moment Bellatrix fired the killing curse. He reached out and just managed to grab onto the young witch's arm.  
"Avada Kedavra!".  
Everything went black.


	2. Nex fio vita (Death becomes life)

Harry, Ron and Neville were alone in the living room at Shell Cottage.  
Bill and Fleur, though shocked, had welcomed the mismatched group into their modest home with grace and compassion. With Mr. Ollivander being the worst injured, Ron and Bill had carried the old man up to one of the tiny guest rooms where Fleur was now tending to his extensive wounds.  
After a hurried chat with Harry, Bill had sent messages to his fellow members of the Order of the Phoenix and was now in deep discussion with the shrewd-eyed Griphook. Luna stood outside on the hilltop overlooking the sea. Bruised, battered and bare-foot the youngest of the group had aged dramatically during her incarceration at Malfoy Manor. The twinkle in her eyes lost as they misted over at the unfairness of it all, her pale and delicate skin etched with lines that were out of place on one so young. She kept a silent vigil for her Gryffindor friend as the waves lapped the beach below.  
Ron paced back and forth across the already threadbare rug, the tips of his ears red, hands clenched at his sides. Harry stood completely still in front of the large fireplace staring blankly at the non-existent flames. Neville sat in a loveseat in the window watching Luna with protective eyes, though his large hands trembled uncontrollably in his lap.  
With a loud 'pop' that made all three boys physically jump, Dobby appeared in the centre of the room.  
The first thing they noticed was that Dobby was entirely alone. The second was that the house elf's saucer-like eyes were filled with tears.  
"No!" shouted Ron.  
"Not 'Mione" whispered Harry.  
Neville turned his head once more to the Ravenclaw on the hillside, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus Snape suddenly became aware of cold, hard marble beneath him. He opened his eyes and waited impatiently for them to focus. The elaborate goblin-made chandelier hanging overhead against a background of hand-painted gold-leaf coving could mean only one thing. He was still at Malfoy Manor and, most surprisingly, he was alive.  
He mentally checked his body for signs of injury but again, Severus was surprised to find that nothing seemed to be amiss apart from a sharp burning sensation in the fingertips of his left hand. Turning his head slowly towards the source of the pain he took a sharp intake of breath as he realised that his left hand was gripping the shoulder of Hermione Granger.  
He yanked his hand away and stood up quickly, ignoring the dizziness brought on by the sudden movement and turned his back on his ex-student. Rage bubbled up inside him like molten lava as he thought of the young witch's broken body on the floor. He took a deep breath and turned, respectfully, head bowed low, to look at her properly. She, like Dumbledore before her, looked almost serene in death. The expressions of pain and worry and sadness gone from their faces, the paleness of death giving them both a look of angelic divinity, calmness and...  
Severus' loud gasp broke the silence of the room and seemed to ricochet off the walls and rebound in all directions.  
Merlin! Hermione Granger was breathing!

Severus dropped to his knees and pulled his wand from his sleeve. The wand glowed blue as he passed it across Hermione from her head to her toes. "Ostendo sum malum" he chanted softly. "Ostendo sum malum". He was no medi-wizard but he had performed the injury revealing spell countless times. Other than the scars on her forearm Miss Granger was showing absolutely no sign of injury whatsoever! Her mind of course may be broken from the extensive Cruciatus curse but only time would tell how much damage she had suffered psychologically. He absentmindedly brushed a loose lock of hair from her tear-stained face and jumped back as if he'd been burned. It was only then that he realised that the Manor felt completed deserted....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The occupants of Shell Cottage, with the exception of Mr. Ollivander and Griphook stood in a circle at the edge of the cliff. Wands raised in their right hands, the light emitting from each wand tip creating a glowing, purple ring above their heads. "Sanctimonialis of nostri" Bill chanted, his soft, gravelly voice barely heard above the sea breeze. "Usquequaque in nostrum pectus pectoris". Fleur sobbed as her husband performed the respectful charm, tears flowed like a waterfall down Dobby's cheeks as his wandless hands clutched the scarf Hermione had knitted for him the previous Christmas. Luna stood tall, her chin held high and proud, determined to be strong for her lost friend. Harry, Neville and Ron were silent, looking at nothing and no one as they each remembered their best friend in their own way.  
A high-pitched screech broke their impromptu remembrance ceremony.  
"The Caterwauling Charm!" shouted Bill, breaking from the circle and running off to the west. "Somebody's at the boundaries!".  
The boys followed Bill as Fleur and Luna clung to each other in fear. Dobby, wracked with guilt at his inability to save his beloved elf-rights protester disapparated without another word.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus had checked the entire Manor whilst Hermione Granger lay in the ballroom, breathing but not fully conscious. The place was deserted. Not even a house-elf in sight. For the first time in his life, Severus felt truly worried. He had openly protected an enemy of the Dark Lord right in front of none other than Bellatrix Lestrange. An icy coldness gripped his heart as he imagined the wrath he would incur when he disapparated to Voldemort's side. There was no question of him not facing the Dark Lord now. He must go immediately and attempt to cover his mistake if he had any hope at all of ensuring the fall of the wizarding worlds most feared enemy since Grindewald. He had no idea how Bellatrix's curse had missed Granger but there was no time for contemplation. He must get the girl to safety and then begin to repair the damage that his one moment of empathy had caused under the steely gaze of Voldemort's most faithful servant.  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~

At the west boundary of Shell Cottage, Bill, Harry, Ron and Neville stared in shock at the reason for the Caterwauling Charm.  
"Hermione?" whispered Harry.  
"I...I don't understand" choked Ron.  
"Who cares what and why!" shouted Neville. "She's alive! Get her inside".


	3. Reproba monumentum (False memories)

As hard as he tried Severus could not stop the guttural scream escaping from his mouth. If Bellatrix's Cruciatus curse was legendary then the Dark Lord's was off the scale. 'Merlin, be strong' was the mantra he kept repeating in his head.   
"My Lord" he grunted in a moment of stillness, "My Lord, let me explain, let me show you!".  
"Of all my followers it is you, Severus, that has disappointed me the most" said Voldemort, his icy voice piercing the silence.  
"Please, my Lord" begged Severus, "let me show you!".  
Using all his power as an occlumens he pushed the memory of Bellatrix's attack at the Manor to the forefront of his mind knowing that the Dark Lord would not be able to resist a glimpse into his usually closed and protected thoughts.  
Voldemort paused, it was enough. He gazed intently into the eyes of the crumpled death eater in the dirt.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

From the second guest room at Shell Cottage a piercing scream filled the air. Bill rushed in to see Hermione thrashing around on the bed her face wrought with agony. He sat down and held her in his arms like she was his own sister. He stroked her hair as she screamed. He whispered her name and told her everything would be ok over and over while his young wife and their guests watched desperately from the doorway.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Legilimens!"

Bellatrix torturing the mudblood.  
The group of cowardly death eaters and snatchers disapparating amid the screams.  
Bellatrix dancing gleefully about the ballroom as she toyed with her prey.  
Distracted in her joy at the suffering of the mudblood on the floor she turned her back carelessly.  
The girl finding strength from somewhere deep inside and dragging herself, unnoticed, up off the floor.  
But someone had noticed.  
Faithful Severus from his dark corner saw what was about to happen before Bella did.  
The young witch raised her wand and pointed it at the death eaters head.  
"Bella!" shouted Snape, throwing himself at the girl and pinning her to the floor.  
Bellatrix, shocked and ashamed fired a haphazard killing curse, narrowly missing Snape but effectively ending the life of the young girl in a flash of green light.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Hermione stopped screaming and thrashing as quickly as she had started. She heaved a deep sigh a fell back to sleep in Bill's trembling arms.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Voldemort's cold, snake-like eyes darted from Snape to Bellatrix, his slitted nostrils flaring in anger.  
"Go, Bellatrix" he whispered.  
Shocked at the use of her full name the only female death eater looked questionably at her master.  
"My...my Lord?" she asked.  
"Now!" he screamed, his voice echoing around the open fields of the graveyard.  
Immense hurt flashed across Bellatrix's eyes as she disapparated immediately.  
The Dark Lord extended a white, bony hand to the death eater still crouched on the muddy floor.  
"Severus" he said with a slight inclination of his head, "my faithful friend. You will, I trust, forgive my doubting you?".  
Severus ignored the bile rising in his throat and took the outstretched hand. He stood and brushed the mud from his robes, silently relieved that the planting of the false memory in his own mind had been enough to convince the Dark Lord of his servitude.  
He nodded respectfully to the wizard before him and replied with one word only...  
"Always".


	4. Saviours , extraneus quod specialis (Saviours, strangers and secrets)

Hermione slept fitfully that night at Shell Cottage. She tossed and turned and tried desperately not to wake the Ravenclaw sharing her room.  
She remembered, of course, the painful torture at the hand of Bellatrix Lestrange, even in her sleep her fingertips glided over the newly-formed scar on her left forearm. The red, raised cuts that spelt out the word 'mudblood', gouged deep into her skin with Bellatrix's wand. She remembered Professor Snape standing in the corner, watching, long after the other death eaters and snatchers had gone. She remembered pleading softly for death, looking into his eyes, searching for the tiniest indication that he was on her side, that he could help. Her fragile mind replayed the moment that Bellatrix had raised her wand, glory and evil lighting her eyes as Hermione waited expectantly for the flash of green light that would be the last thing she ever saw.  
But the green light never came. Instead a golden light, so bright it hurt her eyes, had filled the room. The light was warm, like sunlight on her skin and she was instantly reminded of the beach in the south of France where she had holidayed as a child. She looked up into the light, ignoring the burning sensation at the back of her eyes, and saw a figure high above her. It was a woman, that was certain, for her dark, wavy hair flowed down to her waist. In that moment Hermione realised that the light was actually coming from the woman herself. It seemed to pour out of her very soul. She smiled at Hermione, her palms outstretched and then everything went black.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"You don't think she's gone a bit, you know, mental do you?" said Ron as the three boys sat around the fireplace at Shell Cottage.  
Harry glared at him as Neville's face paled.  
"Sorry, Neville" Ron mumbled, his ears reddening.  
"It's not completely unusual in the Muggle world, Ron" Harry explained. "They call it a near-death experience. I remember Aunt Petunia telling Aunt Marge about it once".  
"Let her rest" said Neville softly. "She's alive. What does it matter what she thinks she saw?".

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus sat alone by the fire in his study Spinners End, the glass of Firewhiskey untouched in his hand. He supposed he should be grateful that the Dark Lord had seen it a necessity that he take some rest before the upcoming battle, but sitting alone gave him time to think, to relive the events of the day. He had no wish to remember the look in Miss Grangers face as she crumpled to the floor after the first Cruciatus curse had hit her. He had no wish to remember the silent plea in her eyes as Bellatrix maliciously branded her with that hateful word. He also had no wish to remember his own pain at the hand of the Dark Lord.   
Miss Granger had survived the killing curse like Potter had so many years before. Why? How? Potter was saved by his mother's love (he couldn't bring himself to say her name even in his head) but Granger had no magical family. He wanted desperately to know why. He hated the unknown. Speculation left room for errors and if there was one thing he hated it was errors.  
He absent-mindedly rubbed at his left forearm as he gazed into the dying flames.


	5. Moeror in iunctum (Grief in unity)

The Battle of Hogwarts had left the castle in complete devastation.  
In the weeks that followed many that had fought had stayed, unable to tear themselves away from the place where friends and family had fallen.  
At the start of each sunset, funeral after funeral was held. Bodies of the young and old, buried, without magic, in a clearing of the Forbidden Forest, blessed by the Centaurs with Firenze firmly at the helm.  
Day times were set aside for rebuilding the castle and in the evenings, meals were held in the Great Hall, the separate house tables long since abandoned with pure-bloods, half-bloods and muggle borns reminiscing and grieving as one.  
They had suffered a great many losses but they had won. Voldemort was dead, never to return, his followers that had survived were already in Azkaban. Of course, some had gotten away. When Harry Potter seemingly returned to life in Hagrid's arms many had fled like cowards. The aurors were hunting them now, vowing never to stop until every last one had been brought to justice.

The hospital ward, miraculously unharmed by the battle, had overflowed with the injured in the first week but slowly people were rising from their beds recovered (physically at least) and joining the clean-up crew in the halls, classrooms and grounds.

Now, four weeks on only two patients remained under Madam Pomfrey's meticulous care.

Severus Snape and Hermione Granger.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Poppy Pomfrey and Minerva McGonagall sat in the small lounge just off the ward, drinking tea and talking in hushed tones.  
"I just don't understand, Poppy" said Minerva for what felt like the hundredth time. "Why won't she wake up? You've said yourself you can find nothing physically wrong with her!".  
"I've told you, Minerva" the medi-witch replied gently. "Dumbledore said..."  
"Oh, that man says many things" interrupted the headmistress, "None of which makes any sense!".  
"Her mind is healing itself" explained Poppy, "Merlin knows what she went through at Malfoy Manor. You've seen the curse on her arm I suppose?".  
Minerva said nothing. Hermione's branding from Bellatrix Lestrange was common knowledge. For some reason, this senseless and personal attack had become a sign of unity within the castle and many students and even staff had taken to wearing a Gryffindor ribbon tied around the left forearm in support of the young witch. Even Draco Malfoy had been spotted wearing one.   
Minerva thought of the youngest Malfoy and how he had changed so dramatically. After disowning his parents and openly stepping up to Harry Potter's side as he faced Voldemort, Draco had worked tirelessly to rebuild the castle as well as attempting to rebuild friendships. He had been met with jibes and insults and even physical attacks at first but when Harry, Ron and Neville had invited him to eat with them in the Great Hall one night, feelings towards the Slytherin boy slowly began to change.  
She thought how proud Severus would be of his Godson, if he ever woke up that is. She looked up at Poppy and realised that once again their midnight chat had resulted in tears and melancholy.


	6. Offensus Suscitatio (Shock awakening)

On June 9th 1998 at approximately 3pm Severus Snape opened his eyes for the first time in over four weeks.

Five minutes later, so did Hermione Granger.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Poppy Pomfrey was checking the drip in Severus' right hand as she did every afternoon. It made her nervous to have a muggle contraption in her hospital but she had to admit, she could see the benefit. When Potter had first mentioned the 'drip' all those weeks ago she was not the only one to find it a terrifying suggestion. She had been wracking her brains to come up with a way to get nourishment into both Severus Snape and Hermione Granger as they lay in their death-sleep (Potter had called this a 'comber' or something). He had overheard her conveying her concerns to the headmistress and had demanded to know why they were not on a drip. She had finally given in when both her patients began to suffer severe weight-loss and had contacted a muggle-born healer at St. Mungo's. Although completely unsure when all the necessary equipment had first arrived Poppy now marvelled at how effective it was and vowed to look for a muggle-medicine book on her next trip to Diagon Alley.  
She removed the old dressing from the back of Severus' hand, so intent she was in her duties she didn't notice his flickering eyelids. She cleaned the small wound with the gentleness of a mother and was just about to apply a new dressing when a warm, calloused hand gently grabbed her wrist.  
She jumped (nearly ripping out the cannula in her haste) and gazed, eyes wide in shock, into the face of her beloved old friend.  
"Severus?" she whispered.  
"Well who were you expecting, Poppy?" came the sneering voice she had missed so much, "Gilderoy Lockhart?".  
"Oh, Severus!" she mumbled as she enveloped him in one of her famous bear-hugs.   
"Get off me, woman" chided Severus, though his tone was delicate. Poppy had always been the only one from whom he would accept any emotional and physical contact. Since his early days at Hogwarts when she had taken on the role of surrogate mother, he had confided in her more than any other person. More so even than Dumbledore.  
"I must tell Minerva" the medi-witch cried as she finally let him go. She turned away but Severus could see the tears in her eyes. "Expecto Patronum!"   
A beautiful, silver koala erupted from the tip of Poppy's wand and set of for the headmistress' office at a heavy gallop.  
"Now just a few checks, Severus" said Poppy (who was positively beaming now) "and then I'll get you some fresh water".  
"Proceed" Severus drawled. "And while you are at it you can tell me what in the name of Merlin this contraption is in my hand."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione opened her eyes.  
She looked around at the familiar sights of the Hogwarts hospital ward, Merlin, how many days had she spent here over the years? More to the point how many days had she spent here this time?  
She moved her fingers tentatively. She felt fine, like she'd just awoken from a long, restful sleep but as she had no memory of how she had ended up here, she did not know what injuries she had sustained or how severe they were. Apprehensively she proceeded to wiggle her toes as for one awful moment she wondered if she had been paralysed in the battle. No, everything seemed fine so far and she breathed a deep sigh of relief. She heard voices from further down the ward and, feeling confident now, turned her head fully towards the direction of the chatter.  
The ward was empty save from two people. Her ex-potions master and Madam Pomfrey.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Am I to assume the Dark Lord has fallen?" Severus asked carefully.  
"Yes" replied Poppy, "Though not without severe losses on our side".  
"That will be a story for another day" Severus said weakly.  
"Indeed" Poppy, "Though it might have been prudent to tell me in advance that you were going to almost kill yourself!" scolded Poppy, her arms folded tightly across her chest.  
"I was hardly in a position to attend a meeting with you, my dear Poppy" Severus scoffed. "As public enemy number two my presence at Hogwarts would not have been welcome, would it?".  
Poppy flushed and turned away. "I never doubted you, Severus" she whispered looking so hurt that Severus felt a pang of guilt. "Dumbledore may have thought he kept his secrets well but I know a dark curse when I see one".  
Severus looked openly surprised.   
"There's not too much that goes on in this castle that I don't know about" she added, indignantly.  
"I'm sorry, Poppy" Severus replied.  
"He should never have burdened you the way he did, my poor, sweet boy" said Poppy, "Now, tell your dear old friend how you survived the worst snake venom known to wizard-kind".

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione Granger lay perfectly still. She knew it was dreadfully rude to eavesdrop but Merlin, she needed information. Voldemort had fallen but did that mean he was dead or captured? And what did Poppy mean about a dark curse and a burden? She already knew of course that Fred, Remus, Tonks and poor Lavender had died in the battle but how many others did not survive that night? The question she really wanted to know though, the one that was burning on her lips, she was almost afraid to ask. What had happened to her?


	7. Insolitus sensus (Strange feelings)

"Oh, Severus!" gasped Poppy, "That was such a risk to take! If you had only been a few minutes late...well, I...".  
"Poppy, stop being so dramatic" Severus chided. "The anti-venom potion had been thoroughly tested previously, although I must admit I did not expect the death-sleep to last so long. I suppose I owe Potter my gratitude," he scowled "This ‘drip' has clearly kept me well nourished".  
"Well, I hated the idea at first" replied Poppy "But I shudder to think what would have happened to you and Miss Granger had I not have agreed to it".  
"Hermione?" Severus questioned sharply. 'Hermione'? Where had that come from? The effects of the anti-venom must have addled his brain. In all his years of teaching he had never once called a student by their first name (with the exception of his godson, Draco, of course). "Miss Granger" he corrected, "She is on a drip also?".  
"Yes" replied Poppy, fixing Severus with a somewhat uncomfortable stare. "Her current, er, situation, is rather perplexing ".  
"Perplexing? In what way?" Severus demanded. Merlin, what was wrong with him? Since when was he so bothered about Gryffindor's most insufferable know-it-all?  
"She collapsed in the middle of the battle" explained Poppy. "She was tending to young Ginny Weasley who had taken rather a battering and she just, well, collapsed! I've run every diagnostic spell I know. No curse, no injuries whatsoever. I've never seen anything like it ".  
Severus averted his eyes. He had, of course, seem something like that before. Although not quite the same, Miss Granger's survival of the killing curse at Malfoy Manor had left her unconscious and injury free. What in Merlin's name was going on?  
"And of course there was her arrival at Shell Cottage" Poppy continued, unaware of Severus' lack of attention. "That was yet another odd thing. Just appeared she did. Woke up screaming the place down a few hours later apparently. Bill Weasley brought her here to me but by the time they arrived she was perfectly fine. I was hoping you would take a look at her for me when you're up to it" she concluded.  
"Why on earth would I do that, Poppy?" snapped Severus.   
"Well, I, er, " spluttered the medi-witch, shocked at Severus' cold tones. "It's just that she hasn't awakened since her collapse at the battle. She's been here ever since".  
Severus' eyes followed Poppy intently as she turned her head to look at the only other occupied bed on the ward.  
"Erm, hello, Madam Pomfrey" said Hermione hesitantly. "May I trouble you for a glass of water?".

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

They were talking about her. She tried to match what they were saying to the memories that were all jumbled up in her brain. Slowly, piece by piece, the events that had happened over the last few months seem to organise themselves into the correct order in her head. It was like watching a silent movie with an ongoing commentary. So, she had collapsed, that much was clear but why? Had she been hexed by some unknown spell that would just send one to sleep? That seemed utterly ridiculous given that those fighting on the dark side had either been duelling to kill or to create injuries that were possibly even worse than death! She began to go through as many defensive spells in her head as she could, trying to see if anything sounded remotely similar to her situation. She was so intent on her mental research that it was a few moments before she realised that the talking had stopped. She raised her head a little and found herself staring into the cold and vehemently angry eyes of her ex-potions master.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus stared accusingly into the young witch's eyes. From the flush in her cheeks it was clear that she had been listening to what he had thought was a private conversation. Exactly how much had she heard? And why was she staring at him in that way? Damn Gryffindor! He may be her EX-professor, Merlin, he was also her EX-headmaster but she should still have the decency to show him a little respect! He noted that she looked thinner than he remembered but not particularly unhealthy. Her cheek-bones were more pronounced and there were creases on her forehead. What horrors had she seen? He remembered how she looked on the floor of Malfoy Manor, serene and peaceful, not broken as he had expected. She looked older now, wiser, more a woman than a mere girl. Poppy's movement beside him broke his thoughts. She looked more like a woman? What was he thinking? When had he ever cared or even noticed what his students looked like? He allowed himself another quick glance. Her blush fading now she had seemingly pulled herself together and was now wearing that defiant, Gryffindor-ish look he hated. That was better. The sooner he was out of this hospital ward and away from Hogwarts, the better.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Tears pierced the back of Hermione’s eyes, threatening to roll down her cheeks any moment. Why was he staring at her like that? He looked so angry, his brow so creased his eyebrows were almost touching! She felt the heat rising in her cheeks and knew she was blushing. He was even paler than she remembered and he had lost a lot of weight. His hair had grown, hanging past his shoulders now and for one crazy moment she wondered what it would feel like to run her fingers through it. Merlin, where did that thought come from? She saw Madame Pomfrey walking towards her and pulled herself together. She looked back at her ex-professor and felt the burn of his eyes penetrating deep down into her soul. She had defended him for months to Ron and Harry and here he was looking at her with absolute hatred in his eyes. Well, two could play at that game. She sat up straighter, squeezed the tears back into her eyes, crossed her hands on her lap and gave Severus Snape the most defiant, Gryffindor-ish look she could muster.


	8. (Severus Snape) Tardus recuperare (Slow recovery)

It was the end of July before the castle had been fully restored to its former glory. Those that had worked so tirelessly had now returned to their homes and so it was only the staff that remained until term would begin again on the 1st of September. Minerva McGonagall was to stay on as headmistress as, despite her protests, Severus Snape had refused to return to his position of headmaster. Declared a war-hero by Harry Potter, his story had been plastered all over the Daily Prophet (by the insufferable Rita Skeeter no less) and there was also talk of an Order of Merlin.

Severus cared little about people's opinions or an Order of Merlin. He cared more that his colleagues had not trusted him, with the exception of Poppy of course (he still felt guilty at his assumption that she had believed him to be a death eater like all the others). The one that had hurt him most of course was Minerva. Yes, her on-off relationship with Dumbledore had clouded her judgment over many things and it was true that he had played his part extremely well over the years, but he still could not forget the look in her eyes when she had called him a coward. She had apologised to him so many times since he had awoken he had now taken to avoiding her completely, eating meals alone in his room and spending every other waking hour preparing his classroom for the new term.

7th year students who had had their education disrupted were invited to return in September to complete their studies. To his delight Potter and Weasley were not returning choosing instead to begin their working life at the Ministry. His contempt for Potter had not faded though he supposed he owed the boy something for the testimony that had kept him out of Azkaban. Weasley would be no loss in any of the Hogwarts classes and as Longbottom was beginning an apprenticeship with Pomona Sprout, that would be another incompetent goon missing from his precious potions lab.  
He would of course have the insufferable Miss Granger in his advanced class and his cocky, but talented godson Draco. They were, by far, the best potions students Hogwarts had seen in a decade and it was a shame that they would not work together. He was reminded instantly of another Gryffindor/Slytherin potions duo, though they had at least been friends to begin with. Friends. He hated the word. It implied two people that would always be there for one other. Clearly, it was not always the case.

The week spent recovering in the hospital ward after he had awakened had been one of the longest weeks of his life. 

His early attempts to ignore his fellow patient had proved fruitless. They had both bombarded Poppy Pomfrey with questions as soon as they had finished their first meal and it was obviously easier for the medi-witch to speak to them at the same time. So, it was together that they had learned how Voldemort had fallen and together they had sat in silence as Poppy had read out a list of the dead. That had been a particularly difficult evening. Though he had considered none of them friends, the pure waste of so many lives was a bitter pill to swallow. So many underage and inexperienced students lost alongside their families, teachers and friends. Though he hated to admit it, the very worst part was seeing Miss Granger's reaction to the death-toll. He'd expected loud sobbing and hysteria (she was a teenage girl after all) but her silent tears and distinguished reverence had been harder to bear. He had unwittingly watched her as each name had been called out. Her lips had quivered slightly and every now and again she would breathe in and out deeply as if to calm herself. Her arms had been wrapped tightly around her as she sat up in her hospital bed and he had wondered if she had been physically holding herself together.

He had pretended to be sleeping when Poppy had informed the young witch of how she had come to be in the hospital wing. He had expected to hear a torrent of questions from the inquisitive Gryffindor but she had merely nodded and accepted the medi-witch's lack of details, thanked her and excused herself to sleep.

She hadn't spoken since then other than to answer Poppy's daily health questions or to ask for water. She had lain in her bed in silence, facing away from him, the quilt pulled tightly up to her chest, the only movement coming from her shoulders rising and falling as she cried herself to sleep every night.


	9. (Hermione Granger) Tardus recuperare pars II (Slow recovery)

It was the end of July before Hogwarts looked like Hogwarts again. After she was allowed to leave the hospital ward, Hermione had stayed on to help with the last of the re-build and clean-up. Not that anyone allowed her to do much work. It was infuriating to have everyone fussing over her when there was absolutely nothing wrong with her! If Harry was annoying, then Ron was unbearable! Even Ginny had taken to following her around like a mother hen. Only Luna and Neville seemed to understand that she was not about to break into a million pieces. She liked the fact that Luna and Neville had finally got together. They were well matched in so many ways. Their relationship seemed different to the many others she'd witnessed over the last few years. They seemed incredibly content in each other's company and were happy not to be constantly 'snogging' (to use Ron's phrase) in every corridor. She frowned as she thought of Ron. They had declared themselves in the middle of the battle of Hogwarts and she had been delighted that what they had been dancing around for years was now finally official. Since she awoken in the hospital wing, however, something had changed. She still loved him of course, well, she was sure she did but it all just seemed a little silly now. She couldn't understand it. She had loved Ron for so long that she couldn't imagine not loving him but there was just something off about it all. She thought back to the 'Lavender' situation in their 6th year. She had been so upset, so hurt and yet now...   
She felt old. Too old for schoolgirl crushes, too old to still be in school in fact but there was no way that Voldemort was going to ruin her magical education. 

She sat at the kitchen table at Grimmauld Place, absent-mindedly stirring her hot chocolate, courtesy of the reformed and highly efficient Kreacher. Harry had been insistent that she stay with him until her return to Hogwarts in September since she was effectively homeless. Both he and Ron had promised to go with her to Australia once they had completed Auror training to find her parents and restore their memories. She hadn't yet told them that she had no intention of doing so. After nearly a year on the run she had become extremely independent and as an of-age witch she was now entitled to find accommodation of her own. Returning her parents' memories was incredibly risky and they had hopefully made a good life for themselves down-under. She had decided, in her week in the hospital wing, that she was going to let them go. She would finish her education at Hogwarts, get a job and find herself a little flat somewhere, maybe in Diagon Alley.

Harry and Ron were going to accompany her to Diagon Alley for one last time, so she could get her school supplies. Her Hogwarts letter had arrived just two days ago, and she was astonished to see she had been accepted into all of her classes despite the lapse in her education. She scrolled down the list once again pausing on the requirements for her potions NEWT class. She felt uncomfortable when she remembered the week she had spent with Professor Snape in the hospital wing. Try as she may she couldn't erase the memory of the hateful glare he had given her when she first awoke. It was so filled with loathing that all she could think of was the afternoon in Malfoy Manor. How he had stood by while she was tortured by Bellatrix Lestrange.   
She had tried so many times to remember what had happened after that, she remembered of course the woman and the bright light, an 'out-of-death' experience she imagined, but how she had got to Shell Cottage was a total mystery. Then there was her collapse during the battle. She could remember Ginny being cursed, she had thought that she might not survive she was hit so bad. She remembered dragging her out of the way, trying to hide her somewhere safe until she could get help. Then there was nothing. Nothing until she had awoken in the hospital wing.   
She would go to Diagon Alley tomorrow, she would re-start her education at Hogwart’s and she would find out what had happened to her. She wouldn't stop until she knew.


	10. Nova Initia (New beginnings)

Hermione was the first student to arrive at the potion’s classroom that afternoon. She had left the Great Hall early after lunch. She was still not quite used to being surrounded by so many people. As much as her time as a fugitive had been worrying, frightening and lonely, at times she missed the peace and quiet of those days. She would settle back in she supposed but it was going to take time. Time and patience, she thought glumly.  
Today would be only the second time she would have seen Professor Snape since their stay in the hospital wing. She had seen him at the Welcome feast of course, though her polite smile had been retuned with a cold, hard stare that had made her physically shiver but she hadn't seen him at all since then. He had not dined in the hall for any of the meals and she had not even seen him wandering the corridors.  
She couldn't explain it, but she had thought that he might have been a little more pleasant toward her this year. After their week recuperating together, she felt that they had shared something, like they had some kind of connection. In fact, in the evenings when she sat by the fireside in the common room, usually alone with a book, her thoughts often wandered to the elusive potions master. She knew his story as much as anyone did after the innumerable articles in the Prophet, but she was fascinated with what she didn't know. How had he seemed so loyal to both sides for so long? Had he been truthfully loyal to Dumbledore all the time? What amazingly difficult and potent potion did he brew to save his life? She knew she would never be able to ask him any of these questions, but she was so intrigued it kept her awake at night. She wondered why he hadn't been dining at the staff table. Did his colleagues still doubt him? Surely not. He had been cleared by the entire Wizengamot and declared a war hero! Even Harry, who had more right than many to hate him, had spoken in his defence.  
Her pondering was suddenly interrupted by a very familiar and extremely sneering voice...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He had three potions prepared for today's NEWT students. The classroom was filled with the comforting sounds of bubbling cauldrons. Severus loved that sound. It was calming, familiar, it was the sound of home. Each of the cauldrons contained a mixed poison. The 7th years today would be making an antidote for the poison of their choosing. He examined his student list once again trying to imagine which poison each individual would choose.  
He had brewed three particularly gruesome and dangerous concoctions. So dangerous in fact that his students were not permitted to be closer than three feet to any cauldron and whilst they would be told what ingredients were used in each, they would not be told any of the instructions about how to brew them.  
Draco would undoubtedly choose Tincta Veneno, a nasty poison that would cause the drinker to spontaneously combust within seconds. Severus himself had been intrigued with the fire poison when he had been a student. The Tormentis Carnem twisted the insides of anyone who touched the thick, paste-like mixture and the Fractus Corpus would break every bone in the body if the liquid was allowed to be transfigured and become airborne. He wondered what Miss Granger would choose. She would be appalled of course at his choice of demonstrative potions. He smiled unwittingly at the thought of her stern face, frowning at him over her cauldron, a loose lock of hair falling across her eyes....  
Severus slammed his hand down on the desk, scattering papers on to the floor. He was sick of having Granger in his head! Since their week spent in the hospital wing his mind had often wandered to the frizzy-haired Gryffindor. He felt very uncomfortable about their encounter at Malfoy Manor. He had thought his days of keeping secrets was over but what had happened there was for no one’s knowledge but his own. A part of him desperately wanted to discuss it with Dumbledore but the thought of sitting in Minerva's office and talking to a portrait did not appeal. He was also not ready to reveal his mad moment of empathy to anyone, not even his old friend.  
Severus shook his head violently as if to clear his head of all ridiculous thoughts and had just collected his papers from the floor when the first of the student began to file in.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

'Do you not wish to attend this class today, Miss Granger?', Professor Snape smirked.

Hermione jumped as if someone had thrown cold water over her. Whilst she had been day-dreaming the rest of the students had arrived and already entered the class.  
She turned her head to see the Professor glaring at her. She mumbled a quick apology without meeting his eyes and stumbled to her seat.

'10 points from Gryffindor for Miss Granger's disrespectful tardiness' Snape sneered. 

Hermione blushed. As she turned her head away from the professors glare she caught Malfoy's eye. In the past his face would have been jubilant at the Gryffindor downfall. Now, however, he gave her a sheepish smile and a wink that said, 'nothing's changed'. At least, not in Professor Snape's dungeon.


	11. Miriam Iunctio (Strange connections)

Severus awoke with a jolt. Tangled in the bed covers, his greasy hair stuck to his face with sweat and his heart pounding, this had to stop! For the fifth night running Miss Granger had invaded his sleep. It was bad enough that he should dream of any Hogwarts student let alone a Gryffindor and a female Gryffindor at that. He rubbed forcefully at his temples as if trying to physically erase the visions that had played out in his mind. Granger on the floor at Malfoy Manor, his hand on Granger's shoulder, Granger in his arms, her lips on his... Granger, Granger, Granger! There was a loud crash as the metal water goblet he had thrown hit the bookcase and ricocheted off into a collection of freshly washed glass vials.  
'Curse you Hermione Granger!' he shouted.   
He supposed he should summon Pippy to clean up the mess, but he couldn't bear the questioning look in the house elf's eyes when she saw the state of his room at three o'clock in the morning.  
He sighed and retrieved his wand from the nightstand. With a casual flick and a silent incantation, the slivers of glass flew up from the floor and joined themselves back together on the shelf. Order restored, Severus decided that there was little point in going back to bed. He would shower, eat an early breakfast in his room and then go for a walk around the lake. Hopefully that would clear his head once and for all.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It was three o'clock in the morning when Hermione finally decided to give up on sleeping. She had tossed and turned all night long dreaming the same dream she had had for weeks. Her time at Malfoy Manor was over for Merlin's sake! Must she relive it night after night? The part of the dream that bothered her the most though was not the torture, the pain or the fear. It was Professor Snape. Try as she might she could not forget the look in his face as she lay on the Manor floor. She had thought he was going to save her, she had willed him with her eyes, but he had not moved, not even given her the slightest glimmer of hope that he was on her side. She normally awoke in a state of panic just as Bellatrix was about to fire the killing curse at her. Last night, however, for the first time, the end of the dream had changed....

She was laying on the cold, hard floor.   
Professor Snape stood expressionless in the corner.   
Bellatrix was laughing, eyes gleaming with excitement, wand aimed and ready to attack.   
Death was imminent, she knew that. A single tear rolled down her cheek at the thought of never, ever seeing her parents or her friends ever again.  
Green light. That would be the last thing she would see. Not Harry or Ron, not Hogwarts, not even the Burrow. Just green light. And nothing.  
She closed her eyes, trying to block out all the fear and pain and greet death in a calm and peaceful way.  
Her eyelids began to burn. This was not what she expected!  
She opened them gingerly.  
The whole room was filled with bright, golden light.   
'This is it' she thought. 'This is Heaven'.  
Then she noticed that the light was coming from something.   
No, not something. someone. A woman!  
She squinted in the light, trying to see who it was but the only feature that was clear was the woman's long dark hair that tumbled to her waist in waves.  
The woman smiled at her, she smiled back and opened her mouth to ask who she was. Before she could speak the woman placed a finger to her lips in a gesture to be quiet. The glowing woman turned and said just one word...  
'Severus'.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus Snape leaned against the ancient oak tree and looked out across the lake. It was a beast of a tree with a trunk so thick that as a child he had been able to hide behind it when times were difficult. The crisp morning air felt fresh and clean in his face and for the first time in days he felt calm. He had always liked this particular spot though he hadn't stood here for many years. Not since... well, not since he had lost the only true friend he had ever known. He turned and rubbed his palm across the weathered tree trunk. Sure enough, just below the bottom-most branch he felt a familiar indentation. A small heart burnt deep in to the bark, with the letters SS and LE entwined inside. He placed his hand over the childish graffiti and closed his eyes. It was here he had told her he loved her, here they had kissed (just one perfect time), here he had called her a mublood and here she had left him. He had returned here immediately after that fateful night in Godric’s Hollow and he had never been here since.  
He thought of her, of Lily (though he stumbled over the name), properly for the first time in months. He let the memories, good and bad, flood his mind so that the pain in his heart blocked out everything else for a few short moments. He let his grief and sorrow and guilt invade his very soul until there was nothing but a burning fire inside of him. Tears blurred his eyes, Lily's face the only thing he could see now, and he sank down onto the dew-damp grass, his legs unable to support him any longer.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione had always liked this tree. The biggest, oldest oak that adorned the Black Lake. This is where she had always come when her first choice of solace (the library) was unavailable. It was big enough to hide behind when she had wanted to be alone. Through the years of teasing about her bushy hair, her teeth and of being a know-it-all, through her fights with Ron and her moments of overwhelming panic when Voldemort had returned. She loved to look at the graffiti-covered trunk, the many burnt on or scratched in hearts with their letters entwined. How many young lovers had made their marks here over the years? How many relationships had begun and ended under the shadow of its vast branches? She thought of Ron for the first time in ages. She loved him, she knew she did. They had been through so much together, planned a future together for after she finished school. The thought momentarily scared her. Did she really want to marry Ron? Did she love him any more or any different to how she loved Harry? Like a brother? For a moment she let her imagination flow... She saw herself standing at the window of the Burrow, waiting for her husband to return. Red-haired children playing in the garden while dinner bubbled away on the stove. She saw herself becoming more and more lonely, more resentful and less herself every single day. She pictured Ron’s hurt and betrayed face as she told him she didn't love him anymore and she sank down onto the dew-damp grass, her legs unable to support her any longer.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus viciously pushed the heels of his hands into his eyes until dark spots covered Lily's face from view. He dropped his hands and rested his head back on to the tree trunk and breathed deeply. His vision began to clear, and he expected her face to appear once more through the murky clouds. Clearer and clearer the features became but an icy cold spread through his entire body as he realised the face in his mind was no longer Lily's...  
It was Hermione Granger's!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione angrily rubbed at her eyes until dark spots covered Ron's face from view. She dropped her hands and hugged her knees tightly to her chest. She breathed slowly and steadily, counting each breath in and out. Her vision began to clear, she expected Ron's hurt face to appear once more through the murky clouds. Clearer and clearer the features became, and a burning fire raced through her entire body as she realised the face in her mind was no longer Ron's...  
It was Severus Snape's!


	12. Quaerens Responsis (Seeking Answers)

Severus Snape paced the headmistresses office with such force that, had she been there, Minerva would have had concerns for the life of her carpet!   
She had graciously given Severus access to her office for as long as was necessary without asking why, though he knew her inquisitive mind was itching to know. After yet another week of dreams featuring Miss Granger, he was sure he was slowly going out of his mind. The time had finally come to speak to his old friend and mentor.  
'Severus, please sit down, I implore you' said Dumbledore from his portrait above the fireplace.  
'Albus, I am losing my mind! I cannot go on like this!' Severus replied, still pacing.  
'Sit, drink and tell me all, dear friend. You have ranted for almost an hour and I still have not the foggiest idea of what you are talking about' said Dumbledore kindly.  
With a sigh, Severus sat in the fireside chair and began to speak. He told Dumbledore of Bellatrix and the torture at Malfoy Manor, this of course was common knowledge, but he had always related the version he had told the Dark Lord. Now however, only the absolute truth would do. He told it all. How his moment of empathy had seen him throwing himself in the way of Bella's killing curse and how he had blacked out. He told of apparating to Shell Cottage with Miss Granger's sleeping but unharmed body in his arms. He also told Dumbledore, red-faced and ashamed, about his dreams. Not in detail (Merlin, no!) but enough to embarrass him into pacing once again.  
'Severus, you are asking me what is wrong with you but from what you have told me all you have done is act like a considerate and brave human being' Dumbledore stated.  
'Albus, you don't understand!' Snape argued. 'I do not want Miss Granger in my head'.   
He strode over to the fireplace, leant his hands on the mantle and watched the flames dancing in the grate.  
The was silence for a few moments when suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed dramatically. There was an electrical-type charge filling the space and Severus lifted his head tentatively.  
'Albus?' he asked, his voice barely audible.  
'Severus, would you so kindly remove that amulet from around your neck?' asked Dumbledore gently.  
Severus did so without question. He was used to the ex-headmaster's cryptic and often confusing demands.  
'Hold it in your palm, please' came the next request.  
He did so, noting that his hand trembled and looked deathly pale in the shadow of the flames.  
'Thank you' said Dumbledore, 'Please sit and let me think for a moment'.  
Once again, Severus did as he was asked. He sat back down in the fireside chair and twirled the amulet between his fingers. He remembered the day his Mother had given it to him. The day he boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time. It was to be the last time he saw her alive.  
'Who gave you the amulet, Severus?' Dumbledore's voice broke into his quiet reminiscing.  
'My Mother' he replied. 'She gave it to me when I left home for my first year at Hogwarts'.  
'And do you remember what she said to you?' Dumbledore asked. 'Was there a certain phrase or incantation she used?'.  
'Matres diligere' Severus recited softly, 'Matres praesidio, tueri coniungi rursus animae meae'.  
'Mothers love' translated Dumbledore, 'Mothers protection'.  
'Protected with my soul' finished Severus. 'I know what it means, Albus'.  
'You may know what it means, Severus' Dumbledore replied, 'But do you know what it does?'.  
'It's a protective amulet, a usual trinket for a Mother to give a child' he scoffed. 'It does nothing'.  
'For once in your life, Severus, can you not let your heart lead you?' scolded Dumbledore.  
'My heart' sneered Severus 'Is not worthy to lead anything or anyone'.  
'You are wrong' Dumbledore stated, with a delicate hint of arrogance, 'About your heart and the amulet. Now, I pray you do not interrupt me as I have a lot to explain to you before Minerva wishes to return to her office'.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione waited patiently as Madam Pomfrey searched through her potions cabinet.   
'Sleepless nights, you say?' asked the medi-witch.  
Hermione nodded.  
'Are you under any stress at the moment, my dear?'.  
Hermione blushed.  
'Is there someone you can talk to?' Madam Pomfrey asked gently. 'We are all quite aware of, of what you went through. Physical scars are much easier to heal than scars on the soul, you know. It takes time to recover. A long time'.  
'I, erm, I think I'm just struggling to settle back in' Hermione mumbled.   
She could hardly tell the Hogwarts Matron that her sleep (and many of her waking moments to be truthful) was disturbed by unwitting thoughts of the potions professor!  
'Ok, dear' Pomfrey nodded, handing her a small vial filled with a metallic blue liquid. 'This is for dreamless sleep, one sip an hour before bed and you'll feel much better'.  
'Thank you, Madam Pomfrey' she replied, tucking the vial safely in her robes.  
'Be warned though' called the Matron as Hermione was leaving, 'It can become rather addictive if used to excess'.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

'This amulet is no trinket, Severus' said Dumbledore calmly. 'Your mother was clearly a very talented witch, it is no wonder you became the wizard that you are'.  
'Please spare me the emotional drivel, Albus' Severus sneered. 'You yourself clearly reminded me that Minerva will soon require her office back'.  
'Very well, Severus' sighed the ex-headmaster, 'But the tale is an emotional one so I suggest you bite your tongue and open your heart for once'.  
'I'm all ears' Severus replied, his tone curt.

'This amulet contains a very powerful magic, magicae de lumine, magic of the light. It is also more commonly thought of as the magic of love. Scoff as you may, you of all people should understand the strength of love and sacrifice when combined with magic. You know that Harry Potter was saved by Lily's protection. As highly as you thought of her, surely you don't think she was the only mother capable of that level of sacrifice? The magic that saved Harry was created in a moment, in an emergency at the time of attack, a one-off shot, if you'll pardon my euphemism. Your amulet, however, is a keeper of magic, the power of love, sacrifice and protection resides inside it, like a living thing. It is quite the opposite to a Horcrux though one cannot ignore their similarities. Have you never questioned your luck in dangerous situations over the years, Severus? Yes, you have been hurt, there is no denying it but the fact that you are still here standing before me proves it. You are an exceptional wizard but even the best of us make mistakes. Your mother has been protecting you all these years. It was her magic that rebounded the killing curse away from you in Malfoy Manor. If you look closely there is a small fracture in the casing, the amulet took the curse for you and saved your life'.

Severus remained silent for quite a while after Dumbledore finished speaking.

'It's a lot to take in, I know' said Dumbledore gently.  
'My mother was not a strong woman' began Severus, his voice distant, 'She spent her married life used and abused by her pathetic excuse of a husband and you expect me to believe that she was such an exceptional witch? Why did she not leave him then? Why stay when magical talent was so obviously oozing out of her pores?' he sneered.  
'Love makes fools of us all' replied Dumbledore simply.  
'Fine' said Severus 'My mother saved me, and so Potter and I have yet one more thing in common. That still doesn't explain my, erm, issues with Miss Granger'.  
'Ah' sighed Dumbledore, 'I do so hope you can keep an open mind'.


	13. Inconcinnus Veritate (The Awkward Truth)

'Enough of this!' shouted Severus. 'I have dealt with your evasiveness for years. Please, Albus, just tell me'.  
'The amulet is designed to protect the owner at all times, and it has done so extremely well since you were a young boy. On that day in Malfoy Manor however, the amulet was damaged by the killing curse. I have already mentioned the damage to its casing. It is my belief that first and foremost the amulets power saved your life but as the curse rebounded the protective casing split open causing the magic to pour out of it and into the room. In doing so it protected Miss Granger too'.  
'So my Mother protected Granger' said Severus, running his hand roughly through his hair, 'That doesn't explain the dreams, Albus'.  
'Severus, did you black out when the curse hit?' asked Dumbledore.  
'Yes' he replied 'Everything just went black. I do not know how long I was unconscious for'.  
'And when you awoke' said Dumbledore 'Did you have any physical contact with Miss Granger? What I mean, very specifically is, did you awake in a position of contact?'.  
Severus opened his mouth to expel a scathing retort and then closed it immediately as the dreadful, gut-wrenching realisation hit him in the chest like a boulder.  
'Coniunctis animis' whispered Severus.  
'Yes' confirmed Dumbledore. 'You and Miss Granger's souls are indeed joined. Permanently'.  
There was blast of air as Severus, robes billowing behind him, stormed out of Minerva's office leaving the portrait of Hogwarts greatest headmaster alone and greatly concerned for his old friend.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

'Albus, won't you tell me what is going on?' pleaded Minerva McGonagall. 'As headmistress do I not have a right to know what is going on with my deputy?'.  
'Alas, dearest Minerva' placated Dumbledore 'It is not my tale to tell. I will say however, that there may be some troubling times ahead'.  
'Not, not....' said Minerva, clutching her chest.  
'Fear not, Minerva' assured Dumbledore 'Voldemort is dead and never, ever to return. No, the troubles ahead are of the heart, mind and soul and we all know how difficult those can be'.  
'Albus, must you always be so evasive?' scolded Minerva.  
The portrait of Dumbledore merely winked and nodded off to sleep.


	14. Periculosa Nexus (Dangerous Connections)

If anyone had been in the corridors as Severus made his way to the dungeons, they would have thought that a cyclone had hit Hogwarts. Incensed, he threw open the lab door with such force that shelves shook, and vials shuddered. Never in all his born days had he felt so angry, so out of control. He had read all about the magical joining of souls. The charm was not unlike an unbreakable vow and although breaking the connection of the souls may not result in death, the pain was said to be more than any human could bear. How could he be connected to Granger? She was a student, a mere child for Merlin's sake! He didn't want to be tied to anyone and especially someone that was not of his choosing! Damn his Mother to hell and back! Damn them all! Severus let out an unnatural, guttural roar that was so full of rage and pain his whole body shook. Like a madman he picked up a large ledger from the desk. He spun, robes twirling and hurled it towards the shelf of potion bottles. There was an almighty crash as glass and liquid flew across the room, tiny shards of glass hitting his face and hands that were not covered by his robes. Utter stillness followed as he stood in the centre of room surrounded by the destruction of his own making. He became aware of the sounds of his harsh, ragged breathing and the warmth of blood on his cheeks. Shocked at his violent outburst, Severus sank to his knees, head in his hands in shame and blood dripping through his fingers.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione sat in one of the fireside chairs in the Gryffindor common room reading what should have been a most interesting chapter in her arithmancy book. It just wasn't the same without Ron and Harry! She wished she could go back to the days of them copying her homework and boring her with confusing quidditch analogies. She missed the sounds of their wizard’s chess games and of Fred and George's regular demonstrations of their latest invention.  
She sighed. Nothing was ever going to be the same again. Voldemort may be gone, the war may be over, but it had taken so much. Friends, family, her childhood. She no longer felt like she belonged in these hallowed halls. She had outgrown Hogwarts, she had outgrown herself. She felt the anger bubbling up inside her. It was unfair. All those wasted lives! All those wasted days! Voldemort had taken everything. Everything she held most dear. He was dead, but had he paid? Had he suffered? She wanted someone to pay, to suffer, to feel what she felt! Her breath quickened as her fury built. Her head was swimming and stars began to form in front of her eyes. She was slipping, slipping away....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The commotion brought Professor McGonagall and Filch and quite a few of the ghosts out into the corridors. The noise was deafening as practically every Gryffindor scurried through the passageways towards the hospital wing. Some were shouting, others were crying, some looked shocked, others afraid.  
'What is the meaning of this?' bellowed Professor McGonagall.  
Everyone began to speak at once.  
'Silence!' she shouted. 'Now, Miss Weasley, as Prefect, you and you alone will tell me why on earth you and the rest of Gryffindor house feel it is acceptable to be out after curfew and making that dreadful racket!'.  
'It's Hermione!' sobbed Ginny. 'Please, Professor. I think, I think she's dying'.  
The crowd parted and Professor McGonagall let out a small scream as she saw the lifeless and bloodied body of Hermione Granger in Neville Longbottom's arms

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione was not dying.  
Madam Pomfrey, though shocked and confused, could find nothing wrong with her other than the strange cuts and abrasions on her face and hands.   
For reasons as yet unknown, Hermione had fainted and was now sleeping in the hospital wing after a potion for dreamless sleep.  
With Ginny and Neville at her bedside the other Gryffindor's had finally been ushered back to the common room followed by an army of house-elves bearing sweet tea and chocolate.  
Knowing that Hermione was in good hands, Professor McGonagall hurried back to her office in search of advice from her trusted friend and ex-headmaster.  
'Albus! Albus, wake up!' she pleaded to the sleeping portrait.   
'I am not asleep, Minerva' Dumbledore replied. 'I am merely gathering my thoughts'.  
'Albus, something terrible has happened!.  
'I am aware of the situation, my dear' Dumbledore replied calmly. 'One good thing about being a portrait is the excellent communication throughout the castle'.  
'Then will you please tell me what to do?' Minerva begged. 'I know you know what's going on'.  
'I promise that I will, but first and most importantly, where is Severus?'.  
'Severus?' asked the headmistress, her tone confused. 'In his rooms I imagine'.  
'Pippy!' called Dumbledore and with a loud crack, the house-elf appeared.  
'Oh, Professor Dumbledore sir, Professor McGonagall, what can Pippy do for you?' she squeaked, her face red with pride at being summoned to the headmistresses office.  
'Pippy, I need you to find Professor Snape as quickly as you can' ordered Dumbledore. 'Find him and then come straight back here to me'.  
'Yes, sir' said Pippy, curtseying. 'Erm, please Professor Dumbledore sir, what shall I be telling Professor Snape when I finds him?'.  
'Nothing, Pippy' replied Dumbledore, 'Just come straight back here'.  
The elf nodded and with another crack, she was gone.  
A moment later she was back, a look of terror on her face, her hands wringing her tiny apron in distress.  
'Oh, Professor Dumbledore sir, oh dear, oh dear!' said Pippy. 'Professor Snape sir, he be in the dungeons, in the potions lab and, and...'.  
'It's ok, Pippy' said Professor McGonagall gently, 'Go on'.  
'Oh, it's awful it is!' continued the elf. 'It's all broken and smashed and poor Professor Snape, well he be sitting there not moving and there's blood and oh dear'. Pippy broke down, huge sobs shaking her slight body.  
'It's ok, Pippy' said Dumbledore. 'Thank you. Go back to the kitchens and ask Winky to fetch you a Butterbeer'.  
Pippy mumbled her gratitude through her tears and disapparated once again.  
'Albus?' Minerva questioned.  
'Phineas, would you please ask Pomona to sit with Miss Granger in the hospital wing?' asked Dumbledore to his fellow portrait. 'Armando, can you ask Poppy to meet Minerva in the potions lab?'.  
Both previous headmasters scuttled away out of their frames and Dumbledore turned his attention to the fraught looking headmistress.  
'Minerva, please believe me when I say that I will tell you everything as soon as possible but at this moment your priority is the welfare of Severus and Miss Granger. I also need to ask you to use maximum discretion'.  
'Of course' said Minerva, her voice shaking slightly. 'I will go to Severus immediately and then you will tell me everything!'.


	15. Concursores et Infidelitas (Shock and Disbelief)

For the second time that year both Hermione Granger and Severus Snape lay in the hospital wing under the watchful eyes of the Hogwarts matron.  
Their injuries now healed, they were both to be dismissed when they awoke.  
Once again Minerva McGonagall sat drinking tea with her friend and confidante Poppy Pomfrey.  
'I just can't believe it' said Poppy, 'As if they hadn't both been through enough'.  
'I don't know who I am more concerned for' replied Minerva. 'Miss Granger is so young, she has her whole life ahead of her and Severus, we both know how difficult he finds affairs of the heart'.  
'Perhaps this will be good for him' stated Poppy. 'It is high time he had someone in his life, someone he could truly rely on'.  
'Oh, be reasonable, Poppy' scoffed Minerva. 'Severus Snape confide in and rely on a student? And a Gryffindor at that!'.  
'Did Albus explain how the connection works?' asked the medi-witch. 'Surely it is not a romantic bonding? Hermione is still a child'.  
'She is of-age, Poppy' replied the headmistress, 'Though Albus did say that love is not necessarily involved. It is a joining of souls, not of hearts'.  
'And their identical injuries?' questioned Poppy. 'Is that normal?'.  
'Albus thinks not' replied Minerva. 'It is his belief that because they have not yet embraced the connection these physical signs, the dreams, the moods and injuries are to remind them of what is at stake, a warning, so to speak'.  
'And Hermione knows nothing about this at all?' asked Poppy. 'When she came to me for a Dreamless Sleep potion, I knew there was something wrong. She's always so level headed'.  
'The poor girl is completely unaware' said Minerva sadly, 'And it is up to me to break the news'.  
'I do not envy you that, Minerva' sighed Poppy, 'Not one little bit '.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

'Come in, Miss Granger' called Professor McGonagall. 'Please sit down. I trust you are now recovered from your unfortunate incident'.  
Hermione took a seat opposite the headmistress's desk.  
'Yes, thank you, Professor McGonagall', she replied. 'Do you know what happened to me?'.  
'I do' the headmistress answered. 'What I have to tell you affects not only yourself but a member of staff and whilst I cannot tell you who you may or may not speak to I implore you to think carefully before you discuss this matter with anyone else'.  
Hermione clenched her fists tightly in her lap. She had known there was something wrong with her for weeks now. The dreams, the strange feelings, it had all started after her time in Malfoy Manor. She thought back to her near-death experience. Perhaps that had affected her brain. Professor McGonagall had mentioned a member of staff. Did she mean Professor Snape? Did they know about the dreams? Hermione felt the heat rising in her cheeks, she was mortified! She tried desperately to recall if she had ever read anything about a student being expelled for dreaming about a teacher. She wished she had never come back to Hogwarts. She should have stayed at Grimmauld Place with Harry!  
'Miss Granger?'.  
'Hermione!' Professor McGonagall called, her voice sharp.  
'I, I'm sorry, Professor' replied Hermione, embarrassed. 'I'm a little nervous'.  
'It is to be expected, my dear. Now listen to me carefully...'

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione left the headmistress’s office in a daze.  
Coniunctis animis. She had read about it of course, the magical joining of souls but she had always thought of it as ancient magic, something from her beloved books and not real life.   
How could she possibly be connected to Professor Snape? He hated her!  
She was a student, a Gryffindor and a know-it-all, everything he despised. Even after everything that had happened there was still no love lost between him and Harry. What chance did she have?  
Professor McGonagall had explained how it had actually happened, of course, but she just couldn't take it in. He had saved her and taken her to Shell Cottage. He had jeopardised everything he had worked for in that one moment.   
The headmistress had asked her to recall every detail, every moment of her time at the Manor. It had been painful, reliving it all again but it did feel better to understand. The figure she had seen, swathed in golden light, had been Professor Snape's mother and protector, Eileen Prince.  
Ron had called her 'mental', when she had first told them about the vision.  
'Oh my goodness!' she thought suddenly, 'Ron!'.  
Without even realising she had walked so far, she found herself standing at the entrance to the Gryffindor common room.  
'Password?' asked the portrait of the Fat Lady.  
'Oh, erm, not at the moment, thank you' stammered Hermione.  
'Well I'm not going to sit here all day while you make up your mind!' she replied hotly and stalked out of the frame no doubt in search of her friend Violet and another box of chocolate liqueurs.  
Hermione stood for a moment listening to the jovial sounds coming from beyond the portrait. How could she face Ginny and Neville and the other Gryffindor's now?   
She turned on her heels and headed back the way she came. She knew where she had to go, she just hoped that she was strong enough to handle what lay ahead.


	16. Facie ad faciem (Face to face)

Severus Snape sat at his lab table poring over the latest potion essays from his first-year class. After all his years of teaching it still amazed him how despicably bad some of the students could be. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. He had hoped marking essays would take his mind off the current situation. Minerva must have spoken to Granger by now. He wondered how she had taken the news. She had probably headed straight to the library, he thought scathingly but a small voice in the back of his mind scolded him with the image of his younger self running straight to the library in times of trouble.   
'I am not like Granger' he said aloud.  
Feeling foolish at his outburst he turned his attention fully to the parchments that lay scattered across his table.  
It was going to be a long evening.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione Granger paced outside the potions lab for a good fifteen minutes.  
She had run over in her mind what she was going to say all the way there.  
She would be calm, polite and to the point. She would not let her emotions get in the way. She reached out her hand to knock on the door and saw it was shaking. What was she thinking? She, Hermione Granger was going to confront Hogwarts' most feared and disliked teacher (second only to Dolores Umbridge) on a matter so personal that she couldn't even imagine discussing it with her closest friends!  
She slumped down on the floor, her back against the door and rested her head on her knees.  
'Pull yourself together, Granger' she scolded herself and promptly burst into tears.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus had spent the last hour scrawling derogatory comment across essays with such ferocity that his hand was aching. He put down his quill and rubbed at his wrist trying to return some life back into his fingers. The palm of his hand brushed over the abrasions that, although almost healed, were still clearly visible. He looked at them intently, noticing each line, curve and indentation. He wondered absent-mindedly if Miss Granger's scars would match his. He had avoided her in the hospital wing and only knew about her injuries from Poppy. He frowned as he imagined her soft, delicate skin marked and damaged. Yet another set of scars to add to her collection he thought ruefully.   
'Pull yourself together, Snape' he scolded himself. Stacking the parchments neatly on the desk with a silent incantation, he headed for the door.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione's head connected with the stone floor with a sickening crack. Severus froze, his hand still on the door, a look of pure terror on his face.  
He looked at the young witch sprawled across the dungeon floor and his heart skipped a beat.  
'Hermione?' he whispered.  
'Ouch' whimpered Hermione, furiously blinking back tears. She pushed herself up into a sitting position and rubbed the back of her head, wincing as she did so.  
With a sigh of relief now that she was clearly conscious, Severus moved out of the doorway and extended a cold, pale hand to the Gryffindor.

'You are bleeding' Severus stated as he examined the back of Hermione's head. She was sat at his desk, a cup of hot tea in front of her.  
'It's just a scratch' she mumbled. Having the Professor in such proximity was doing nothing for her nerves.  
'Do you have eyes in the back of your head, Miss Granger?' Severus questioned sardonically. 'You will drink your tea and allow me to tend to your wound'.  
'Yes, sir' she replied acerbically.  
Severus took a deep breath hoping to ignore the sharpness in her reply. It had the absolute opposite effect! The soft scent of apples and strawberries assaulted his senses. His thumb gently brushed over her hair and he felt her head tip back into his hands.

What was he doing? What was he thinking?   
'Get out' he whispered.  
Hermione didn't move.  
'I said, GET OUT!' he bellowed.

Hermione jumped up at his shout. She turned, ready to flee and found herself face to face with her supposed soul mate. Her anima alterum.  
She took a deep breath, lifted her chin proudly and looked directly into his eyes.  
'No' she whispered.  
'Excuse me?' said Severus.  
'I said no' she replied, her voice quavering, 'I am not going anywhere'.  
'Sir' she added as an afterthought.

How dare she disobey him? He was her teacher!  
'Miss Granger, do not get ideas above your station' he said, his voice cold steel. 'You will leave this room immediately and you will not return'.

Hermione stood her ground. She was determined not to move. He would have to throw her out using physical force if necessary. She hadn't asked for this, but she was sure as hell that he was not going to ruin her life any more than it was already. Things needed to be discussed and she would stay there until he agreed to talk to her.

She wasn't moving. Never in all his years as a professor had a student defied him so openly and so severely. Not even Potter! A small part of him admired her bravery but he would not be held to ransom by anyone, let alone a Gryffindor! 

He hadn't asked for this. She needed to go. Now.

The situation that followed seem to play out in slow motion.

Severus, furious at Hermione's disobedience, reached out to grab her arm with the intention of physically removing her from his lab. Sensing what he was about to do, she in turn raised her hand to stop him. As their palms connected there was a flash of brilliant white light that filled the room with a pulsating thrum. Heat flooded through their veins reaching boiling point at their joined fingertips. Both were stunned, both a little afraid. It was a magic that neither had ever experienced before, a power so strong and so infinite it was beyond all understanding. It was as though their hands had been welded together and their feet cemented to the floor. Neither moved, afraid to even try, afraid to stay, afraid to let go.  
It was she who spoke first.

'Professor Snape?' she said, her voice trembling, 'What's going on?'.  
Severus did not answer. He was incapable of speech and of thought.  
'Professor Snape?' she pleaded, 'I'm scared'.  
Still nothing. He was in a daze, lost in a magic that he could not fathom.  
'Severus?' she whispered.  
Her voice speaking his given name finally brought him to his senses.  
'I'm sorry' he replied. 'So very, very sorry'.

The light faded, the thrumming subsided, the heat left their bodies and their hands dropped to their sides. Hermione took one look at the professor's pained expression and fled.


	17. Dolor, qualm culpa et dissensum (Pain, guilt and Dissent)

Severus was sitting in his study when he heard the familiar tapping of a beak on the window. He rose from his fireside chair and saw a magnificent tawny owl sitting on the ledge. He threw open the sash and the bird flew in, landing majestically on the table, his leg extended. Severus removed the scroll and rummaged in the bureau for a treat.   
It was indeed a beautiful creature. He paused for a moment to stroke its head wondering at the sender of the letter. This was definitely not a school owl. While the school owls were excellently cared for, this bird was rare and expensive, something you would expect to belong to a high-class pure-blood family. He paled at the thought and dismissed the creature quickly to open the letter...

'Dear Professor Snape,

I wish to apologise for my impolite departure from your classroom last week.  
I had planned to discuss with you our current predicament and so I am asking you to meet with me at a time convenient to you.

Yours sincerely 

Hermione Granger'

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus read and re-read the short note over and over again. He immediately felt guilty and ashamed of his behaviour of late. Hermione's note was polite, mature and concise whilst he had behaved rudely, cowardly and selfishly. She clearly wanted this magical connection no more than he did and she certainly could not be blamed for it happening in the first place. 'Yes' he thought to himself, 'I will meet Hermione and maybe together we can find a way to break the connection'. He took a piece of parchment and quill from the desk and composed a reply in his own scrawled hand...

'Dear Miss Granger,

If it is convenient to you I should like you to come to my study at 8pm this coming Friday.

Sincerely

Professor Snape'

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It wasn't until much, much later after he had carefully folded Hermione's note and pocketed in his robes that he actually sat and thought about their forthcoming meeting. He had never met with a student in his private study before and though Hermione was an of-age witch, a woman really, he wondered what his colleagues would think about the situation. Not that he had ever much cared for other people's thoughts and opinions. He would, however, discuss a few things with Albus before the meeting.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione was sitting on her bed reading when Arianrhod returned. The beautiful bird tapped gently at the glass and as Hermione opened the window she hopped in, her head bowed low as if ashamed. Hermione's eyes darted to the owl’s delicate legs and noted, with fury, that Arianrhod had brought no reply from Professor Snape.   
"It's not your fault, silly" she muttered, gently scratching the birds head. She rummaged in her cloak for an owl treat which Arianrhod took gladly and watched as her pet and friend took flight out into the cool night air.  
She was silently cursing the Professor when a loud crack made her jump.  
"Please, Miss" said Pippy the house-elf, her eyes wide in terror, "Pippy didn't mean to scare you, Miss".  
"It's quite alright, Pippy" comforted Hermione, "I just wasn't expecting visitors".  
"Well, begging your pardon, Miss, Pippy has come with a letter, Miss, from Professor Snape" Pippy replied, visibly more relaxed.  
The house-elf handed over a small roll of parchment with a crisp, green and silver seal.  
"I is to give you this, Miss and then get back to Professor Snape without gossiping, meddling or dawdling, Miss" the elf announced proudly.  
Hermione coughed as she tried to disguise her laughter. Oh, she could just imagine Professor Snape giving those exact instructions to poor Pippy.  
"Thank you very much, Pippy" she replied, sincerely.  
Pippy curtseyed and with a crack, she disapparated.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Many hours (and re-reads) later, Hermione finally folded Professor Snape's letter and tucked it away in her trunk. Friday, that meant she would have to skip yet another two potions lessons! She had already missed three and at this this rate she was going to fail her NEWT miserably. Ginny had been bringing her the homework and she had handed in every essay, of course, but people were starting to get suspicious. Hermione hated anything spoiling her education, Merlin she had even tried studying when they were hiding in the Forest of Dean, but there was absolutely no way she was stepping back inside the potions lab until this matter was resolved!  
She would have to come up with yet another excuse. Two in fact! Last week she had had a migraine and cold. Maybe she could anger Ginny into casting her famous bat-bogey hex on her or sit next to Seamus in Charms, that was always dangerous. Professor Snape had made no comment on her absence from his classes. She knew he wasn't stupid, but she thought he would be angry and at least send word of detention. Clearly, he was happy not to see her. She felt strangely sick at the thought. She glanced around at her fellow Gryffindor's, sleeping soundly and peacefully and she envied them. She couldn't remember the last time she had had a decent sleep. With her days and most evenings devoted to studying, the only time she had a moment to think about her 'situation' was when she lay in bed. Professor Snape appeared in her dreams every night in some way or another and she would awake early every morning feeling like she hadn't slept at all. She wished she had someone to talk to. She had Ginny of course, but she couldn't possibly talk to her about this! She couldn't expect the younger girl to keep her secret from Ron and she could only imagine his reaction! He had sent her flowers on her birthday and she had received a very worried letter from Harry when she was in the hospital wing but now they were heavily into their Auror training neither had been able to visit. Hermione sighed and snuggled down under the quilt. It was going to be a very long week...


	18. Et admiriatio expectat exercitus (Waiting, worrying and wondering)

Severus took a deep breath and entered the headmistress’s office. Minerva had once again graciously allowed him private access to her room to speak to Dumbledore.  
"How are you, dear friend?" enquired the portrait above the fireplace.  
"I have had better days" sneered Severus. "I have no time for pleasantries today, Albus".  
"Must you always be rude, Severus?" sighed the ex-headmaster. "It may make your current predicament a little easier if you were to act a little more human from time to time".  
Severus opened his mouth to retort but his hand inadvertently brushed against Hermione's letter in his pocket and he stopped, mouth open, looking somewhat like a goldfish.  
Severus shook his head and took a seat in the fireside chair and gave a deep sigh.  
"I am afraid I do not know quite where to begin, Albus" he said.  
"My dear boy" replied Dumbledore "I always find the beginning is a very good place to start".

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione sat in the love-seat at the window in Gryffindor tower and looked at her watch for the hundredth time. In an hour she would be heading for the Great Hall with Ginny for dinner and not long after that she would take the long walk down to the dungeons for her meeting with Professor Snape.  
She had no idea what was going to happen that evening, but she had decided one thing for sure. If the meeting went badly, which in her heart of hearts she fully expected it would, she would be leaving Hogwarts the following morning. She would get herself a job and start her new life. She wondered if Harry would let her stay at Grimmauld Place until she found her feet, she knew Molly would welcome her with open arms at the Burrow, but it wouldn't feel right, not now, probably not ever. She would need to sit down and talk to Ron, the things they needed to discuss could not be put in a letter, she owed him that much at least. She looked at her watch again and sighed.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"It is a simple case of honesty and compromise" stated Dumbledore.  
"But she is a child, Albus!" replied Severus, his voice tired.  
"She is a woman and you know it!" scolded Dumbledore "She came of age two years ago. Many witches are married by that time".  
"Married?" Severus whispered. "Albus, surely you can't mean...."  
"She would suit you well, you know" said Dumbledore in his matter-of-fact way. ""She is intelligent, hard-working and extremely loyal. You deserve love, Severus, no matter what you think".  
Severus clenched his fists, anger coursed through his veins and it was all he could do not to smash the portrait that smiled down upon him.  
"You interfering, pontificating, old fool!" he bellowed and stormed out of the office with a force that shook the walls.  
From his frame above the fireplace Albus Dumbledore smiled and went back to sleep.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione glanced towards the staff table as Ginny babbled on about the forthcoming Quidditch match against Slytherin. Professor Snape was absent once again from dinner, she wondered if he would ever return to dining in the Great Hall. She pushed food around her plate rather than actually eating it and as soon as she could leave without arousing suspicion she excused herself from the table and headed for the dungeons.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus sat, stony faced, in his fireside chair. The meeting with Albus had done nothing to ease his nerves. In fact, it had had the complete opposite effect. He had hoped his friend and mentor would have given him some advice on how to reverse the connection or at least how to live through it. Instead he suggested that he, Severus Snape, head of Slytherin house, marry Hermione Granger, student and Gryffindor! He rubbed at his temples trying to massage away the headache that had been bothering him for over a week. He closed his eyes and used a well-honed technique to empty his mind of all thoughts. He was just beginning to feel slightly more relaxed when a tentative knock on the door broke his concentration.


	19. Novam habitudinem (A new relationship)

Hermione entered the study with what she hoped was a mature and confident air even though her heart was beating so loudly she felt certain that the professor must be able to hear it.  
"Good evening, Miss Granger" said Severus, his voice controlled and forcibly polite, "Please take a seat".  
He gestured to the fireside chair that he had just alighted and took a seat himself on the antique sofa.  
"Good evening, Professor" Hermione replied as she sat down, "Thank you for agreeing to see me".  
"It was necessary" Severus replied. "Would you care for a drink?".  
"If it's no trouble" she replied politely.   
"I am not an entirely hopeless host, Miss Granger" he quipped, a slight smirk playing on his lips.  
Hermione blushed, wondering how he could be so calm, calm enough to joke when she felt like a grindylow out of water.

Severus busied himself at the dresser, glad to look away from the young witch for a moment or two. It had been many years since he had entertained anyone in his study and even then, it had only been Albus, Poppy and on occasion Minerva. He took a deep breath and, glasses in hand, turned back to his guest.

While his back was turned away from her Hermione relaxed slightly and took the moment to examine her surroundings. It was a simple room with dark wood furniture and an absence of warmth and comfort. The drapes that hung at the window were deepest emerald and the only adornment on the wall was an ornate silver Hogwarts crest. What she did love about the room however was the bookcase. One entire wall, from floor to ceiling, devoted to books like a personal library. She desperately wanted to examine some of the obviously ancient tomes but didn't dare get out of her seat to look.  
She was still staring, straining her eyes to read the various titles when Severus interrupted her.  
"Your drink, Miss Granger" he said.   
Hermione whispered a small thank you in reply. She didn't wish to appear childish but even the smell of the firewhiskey made her eyes water. How on earth would she drink it without looking a complete idiot?  
"What shall we drink to?" Severus asked.  
"The future?" Hermione replied.  
"The future?" he replied. "Really Miss Granger, I expected something a lot more eloquent from someone as openly loquacious as you".  
He was smirking, teasing her again. How dare he!  
"Well I thought that a toast to hope that we could get through this entire meeting without Gryffindor losing house points seemed a bit of a mouthful" she replied scathingly, getting up out of her seat and standing to face the object of her annoyance.  
Severus bit back his own retort and settled for raising an eyebrow at the young witch blushing furiously in front of him. He half imagined her to stamp her foot. Menacingly he took a step closer towards her, then another, he could hear her breathing accelerate, see the movement of the golden liquid in her glass as her hand shook.  
"I think we can leave the house system out of tonight's discussion" he murmured, "but perhaps you would allow me to make an appropriate toast?".

He was goading her. He knew it was harsh but if they were to come to any kind of acceptance of this curse then she would have to take him for what he was. He would not change for anyone. She would either stand her ground and they would move forward or she would falter and fail. 

He was goading her. She knew instinctively that it was a test. She knew he thought her childish and aggravating. She was nothing but another pathetic student to him, but they were joined in a way that would affect both of them for the rest of their lives. Did he want her to turn tail and run away like she had before? She lifted her chin proudly and looked him firmly in the eyes.

"I believe that would be acceptable" she replied. "Severus".  
He smiled (she had never seen him smile before) and raised his glass to hers.  
"Novam habitudinem" he whispered, his voice unnaturally tender.  
Refusing to ask what it meant she too raised her glass and touched it gently to his.  
"Novam habitudinem" she echoed and drained every last drop of fire whisky.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Several hours and glasses of firewhiskey later, Severus' study looked like it had been hit by a tornado for the second time that term. Books were strewn all over the floor, bureau and table. Somewhere in the middle of the mess was Hermione. Cross-legged, her hair dragged back in an untidy knot, a frown across her pale forehead as she pored over yet another volume.   
Severus was the absolute opposite. He sat in the fireside chair, not a hair out of place, not a crease in his robes, his face calm as he idly scanned an enormous leather-bound journal.  
"This is positively ridiculous!" Hermione said loudly, closing the book with a snap.  
Severus smiled. Again. They had spent most of the evening in silence broken only by Hermione's regular outbursts of annoyance as her revered books let her down time and time again. It was surprisingly comfortable having her here. As much as he was loathe to admit it, they were quite similar creatures. She seemed quite happy to work alone and spoke only when necessary rather than wittering on like most females he knew.  
"Another drink, Miss Granger?" he enquired. "You look as though you could use a break".  
"Please" she replied, as she slowly got to her feet and made her way precariously across the untidy floor to the sofa.  
Yet another glass of firewhiskey in hand they sat in a comfortable silence.  
"There is another option, of course" Severus said quietly, his eyes lowered.  
Hermione lifted her head sharply and looked at him questioningly.  
Severus looked at her, his eyes boring into hers. He wished at that moment that she was a legilimens. He didn't know, or rather didn't want, to say it out loud. It would be embarrassing for the both of them.  
Hermione noted the pleading look in the Professor's face. Did he mean what she thought he meant? For one short moment he looked so different to the man she had come to know over the years at Hogwarts. He seemed somehow fragile and she knew that she would have to be the strong one in this instance.  
"I am willing to try if you are" she said, as confidently as she could.  
Severus visibly relaxed and his face returned to its usual closed expression.  
"I am" he replied, looking away immediately after the words left his lips.  
Hermione smiled and sipped her drink slowly, savouring the warmth as the golden liquid hit her chest. The sofa was surprisingly comfortable and the dancing flames in the fireplace were soothing and somewhat hypnotic. Her eyelids began to feel heavier and heavier, the grip on her glass became looser and looser...  
"I think we should discuss some ground rules" Severus began, "I see no need to.."  
His voice faltered as he lifted his head and looked towards Hermione.  
With her glass held precariously in one hand and her chin resting on the other, Hermione Granger was fast asleep!  
Severus did not know whether to be amused or angry. With a silent incantation he levitated her glass onto the table and then got up from the chair with the intent of waking her. He took a couple of steps towards the sofa and stopped. She looked so peaceful. The brow that had been furrowed for most of the evening was now smooth, the hair that had been pulled back so tightly now escaping in soft tendrils across her face. Severus reached out a hand instinctively and brushed a long, loose curl off the sleeping witch's face. She sighed as he did so and turned her head into his hand. He froze, his hand trapped between the back of the sofa and Hermione's soft cheek. Now he began to panic. He couldn't possibly wake her now, not when he was in such close proximity to her. He was touching her for Merlin's sake! He took a deep breath and as gently as he could, removed his hand. Hermione sighed again and settled deeper down into the sofa, tucking her hands under her ear. Severus stood, completely immobile, in front of her. She couldn't stay here, in his study. The idea was beyond preposterous! The alternative of her sneaking through corridors back to the dormitory this far after curfew however was just as appalling.   
'No one need know' he thought to himself.   
He carefully transfigured the sofa into a soft chaise longue, a deeply cushioned green velvet affair with a large arm to support Hermione's head. He levitated her legs onto the chaise and summoned a blanket from his room to cover her with. He looked around at the book-strewn room and deciding it could wait until morning, stalked out of the room without a backward glance.


	20. (Severus Snape) In Mane (The Morning After)

Rays from the early morning Autumn sun filtered through the gap between the heavy drapes and cast a glow across Hermione's sleeping face.  
Severus moved through the room as quietly as he could, given the books that still littered the floor. He hated leaving his study in this state but the prospect of waking the sleeping witch was enough to make him ignore it just this once. He paused for a moment wondering why he had never noticed the bronzed highlights in her hair before. He decided it must be the way the sun touched only parts of her hair for he couldn't imagine her wasting her time with colour potions the way many other young witches did. Her skin was almost iridescent in this light and completely flawless. She looked so calm and relaxed, not even showing a hint of the worries that had plagued his own sleep. Could they really do this? Live and work alongside each other as student and teacher connected in the way that they were? All night long she had featured in his dreams, always close by but never close enough. It was like he was watching her life through a pensieve. He saw her making foolish mistakes as he stood on the fringe, utterly powerless. The last dream (and the reason he was up at this foolish hour) had left him feeling the most confusing selection of emotions he had ever felt in his entire life....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus stood in a shadowed corner of the Great Hall. The bewitched ceiling shone with the light of a thousand stars and the floor was scattered with tiny pink petals. The house tables had been replaced by many dainty white chairs each tied at the back with a shimmering pink bow.  
Almost instantaneously the hall was filled with people chattering excitedly.  
Severus allowed himself a glance towards the very front of the hall. The flame-red hair of the Weasley boy was hard to miss, as was the unruly black mop of Potter as the pair stood side by side in their best dress robes.  
Kingsley Shacklebolt, in elaborate robes of deep blue and gold stood in Minerva's usual place, behind the ancient golden eagle lectern.  
At a gentle wave of the Minister's wand a string quartet sitting discreetly in one corner began to play and an expectant hush fell over the Great Hall.  
Severus vaguely recognised the music though he did not believe it came from the wizarding world. No, this was muggle music. This was pure Granger. He unwillingly turned his head to the left just as the huge oak doors opened majestically. A vision in robes of white and silver entered the hall with the grace of a ballerina. Soft brown hair cascading over her shoulders, a bouquet of pink roses in her hands. She was so close, he had one chance, just one! He tentatively took a step towards the young bride. She turned her head, he waited, heart pounding, willing her to come to him. She smiled, a pityingly, apologetic smile and continued her walk towards her new life. A life that did not contain him.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He had woken abruptly with an overpowering feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. He had refused to think about the implications of the dream choosing instead to begin the day with a cold shower and large dose of denial. Now, standing over the sleeping witch it all came flooding back to him. He placed a carefully folded parchment on top of one of the many journals and swept silently out of the room.


	21. (Hermione Granger) In Mane pars II (The Morning After)

Bright, autumn sunlight pierced through Hermione's closed lids awakening her from the best sleep she had had in months. She felt so warm and comfortable she was loathe to get up.   
'Five more minutes won't hurt' she thought to herself, smiling.   
Unfortunately, her five extra minutes of bliss only lasted for the few seconds it took for her brain to remember where she was.  
Hermione sat up so fast her head swam. She clutched her cover to her throat and froze.  
The room was silent.   
“Professor Snape?” she whispered.  
Still silence.  
“Professor Snape?” she called again, more loudly this time.  
When there was still no reply she relaxed a little and surveyed her surroundings. Looking around her she suddenly understood the reason for her comfortable sleep. The chaise longue on which she had spent the night was an elegant, green velvet trimmed with a light silver thread and antique silver buttons. The blanket covering her was basic, but thick and clean. Hermione blushed at the realisation that it had probably come from Severus' own chamber. Her hand lightly stroked the plush velvet chair arm and her eyes filled unwittingly with tears as she thought of the kind gesture and the professor's thought for her own comfort.  
They had decided last night to try and make it work between them, but what did that exactly mean? Were they going to be 'friends', 'acquaintances' or (Hermione blushed again) something more?   
Hermione thought back to the dreams she had had last night...  
She remembered nothing solid about any of them except an overwhelming feeling of safety and complete happiness.   
She looked at her watch and was momentarily panicked by the late hour until she realised that it was Saturday! She didn't know what time the professor would return (maybe he was waiting for her to leave) but she wanted to do something to repay his kindness for allowing her to stay the night.  
The room was an awful mess. There were so many books strewn around that the bookcase was almost empty.  
Standing up she retrieved her wand from the coffee table and began…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Just under an hour later, Severus' study was back to its former glory.  
The bookcase was full again, their Firewhiskey glasses sparkling in the bureau and the beautiful chaise longue transfigured back to its old self.  
Hermione folded the blanket carefully by hand and laid it on one end of the antique sofa. It was only then, when the room was finally tidy that she noticed the piece of parchment. It must have been knocked on to the floor when books were flying around.  
She unfolded it gingerly.

'Dear Miss Granger,  
I trust you slept comfortably. When you awaken please feel free to summon Pippy to make you tea or whatever you may require.  
As decided we will try and work through our unfortunate connection. I did hope to discuss ground rules with you last night, but you were clearly exhausted.  
I suggest we meet again as soon as possible. Please leave me a message or send an owl with a date that is appropriate to you. In the meantime, please ensure that you stick to appropriate student/teacher protocol. I would also add that you should NOT miss any more of your potions lessons unless you wish to fail your NEWT. I expect only the highest standard of work and commitment from my students, Miss Granger and I do not wish our predicament to interfere with either your studies or my work.  
Please know that I am truly glad that we were available to sort this out in such an agreeable manner.  
Wishing you a pleasant weekend.  
Professor Snape'

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione's eyes burned with hot tears. She had gotten it so wrong!  
Certain words and phrases seemed to jump right off the parchment and smack her in the face. 'Unfortunate connection' and 'student/teacher protocol' were like the slashes of a knife across her heart. She sank down onto the sofa, her eyes now so full of tears that the words on the page were completely illegible.  
She sat motionless, unable to move for what seemed like an eternity until her logical and determined mind kicked in.  
She stood abruptly and wiped the tears harshly from her eyes with the heel of her hand. She scrunched the parchment in her fist and threw it angrily across the room, the only bit of mess in the now spotless study. She allowed herself one final glance of the room she had so admired last night and with a swirling of robes that Snape would be proud of, she fled.


	22. Currit a Vita (Running away from life)

She placed the sealed and carefully written parchments next to the folded school robes on her perfectly made bed. The letters for Ginny, Neville, Luna and Draco contained very little information. She had merely wished to thank the first three for their friendship and inform them of her leaving. Up until that very moment she had deliberated over leaving a letter for Draco or not. Yes, they had history, a terrible history actually, but the war had changed everyone, and Draco was no exception. She could not forget the ribbon he had worn in support of her and the lopsided smiles he had flashed at her during particularly miserable potions lessons.   
The letter she had written Professor McGonagall had gone some way further to explaining her reasons for leaving. Not in detail of course, just that she no longer felt at home at Hogwarts and needed to make a fresh start. She hoped Ginny would not find them until she was safely away from the castle and would deliver them all (even Draco's) without protest. She had already sent Arianrhod off with letters for Harry and Ron informing them both of her news and asking Harry if she could stay at Grimmauld Place until she had found somewhere of her very own.  
The Gryffindor common room was deserted of upper students who were all enjoying the bright Autumn sunshine in Hogsmeade and the small collection of younger Gryffindor's paid her no attention as she passed through. All her belongings were packed once again in her beaded bag, she looked merely like she was going for a walk.  
She didn't encounter a single soul in the castle but as she crossed the grounds and headed towards the gate she noticed a familiar figure at the edge of the forest. Hagrid! Feeling immensely guilty she found cover under a large oak and scrabbled around in the beaded bag for a piece of parchment and quill.  
Wishing she had Harry's invisibility cloak, she crept cautiously to Hagrid's hut. Using a temporary sticking charm she placed the note upon the door and crept quietly away before she could be seen.  
As Hermione stepped through the formidable gates of Hogwarts she breathed a deep sigh of relief and sadness.  
She didn't want to leave but she knew now that she couldn't possibly stay.  
She closed her eyes, picturing the door of number 12 Grimmauld Place and with a slight turn, she was gone.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

She knocked respectively on the door (ignoring Harry's previous instructions to let herself in any time she wanted) and waited patiently. Minutes later she was greeted enthusiastically by a beaming Kreacher.  
“Come in, Miss Hermione” Kreacher welcomed with a deep bow.  
“Master Harry told Kreacher to expect you”.  
Even though she had stayed with Kreacher at the end of the summer, Hermione could not get used to Kreacher's battle scars. The angry gash across his face would never fade and though he insisted that the missing fingers on his left hand would not hinder him, she knew it couldn't be easy for him.  
“Thank you, Kreacher” replied Hermione, warmly and she followed the elf through to the kitchen where it was immediately apparent that Kreacher had indeed been expecting her.  
The table was laid for two with a steaming soup tureen in the centre and a loaf of homemade bread. There was a delicious aroma coming from the old oven and a beautifully iced cake sat upon the counter.  
“Kreacher” she called, “Is someone joining us for lunch?”  
Hermione's question was answered with a flash and a thud as Harry Potter came tumbling out of the fireplace.  
“Harry!”  
“Hermione!”  
Hermione ran and hugged her friend with such force that it was lucky that they didn't both end up in the fireplace.  
Harry took Hermione's hand and led her to the table where Kreacher began silently ladling onion soup into little bowls.  
“What's going on, Hermione?” asked Harry.  
“Nothing” she replied, shaking her head. “Hogwarts just isn't the same any more. I.... I can't settle”.  
“Oh, come off it, 'Mione! You studied in a tent by firelight whilst on the run and yet you can't settle at Hogwarts?”  
“I can't stay there!” Hermione shouted, banging her hands down on the table.  
Harry looked at her stricken face and felt momentarily stunned. From out of the corner of his eye he saw Kreacher, frozen to the spot watching Hermione with anguish. Harry looked back at his best friend and saw a solitary tear roll down her cheek.  
“Mione....” he pleaded.  
“I can't stay, Harry” she whispered. “Not with him”.  
Harry's thoughts turned immediately to Draco Malfoy. He thought the Slytherin had changed, thought it was safe leaving Hermione in his presence while he, Harry, went off to start his Auror training. Anger boiled up inside him. Anger and guilt.  
“Slytherin scum!” Harry spat.  
Kreacher dropped the bowl he was carrying and the homemade soup he had so lovingly prepared splashed across the floor.  
“Master Harry”' Kreacher spluttered, “Kreacher is so sorry! Bad Kreacher, bad Kreacher!” and he flung himself onto the tiles, sobbing.  
Hermione rushed around the table and dropped to her knees beside the devastated house elf.  
“It's ok, Kreacher” she crooned. “Look, we can fix it” and she waved her wand in a silent incantation. The bowl repaired itself immediately and in a trice the floor was spotless once more.   
“Go and take a break, Kreacher” Hermione said kindly. “I'll keep the soup warm enough for later”.  
Kreacher left the kitchen still looking pained and Hermione sat back down at the table wearily.  
Harry hadn't moved, his clenched fists resting on the table, his mouth pulled so tightly shut that his lips were almost white.  
“Harry?” she questioned.  
“Tell me now, Hermione” demanded Harry, “What has that greasy, blonde, slimeball done to you?”  
Hermione looked at him, confusion in her eyes.  
“Blonde...?”  
“Has he touched you?” Harry continued. “If he has hurt a single hair on your head, 'Mione, I swear to God I'll....”  
“Harry!” Hermione shouted. “It's not Draco! He's fine, he's... well, he's my friend''.  
Harry brushed a trembling hand through his messy hair and let out a deep sigh.  
“I think you better tell me what's going on, 'Mione” he said, his voice still edged with anger.  
“You're not going to like it, Harry” she said, “you are really not going to like it”.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Three hours later, Harry and Hermione were still sitting at the table drinking Camomile tea and eating Kreacher's cake.  
“I still don't understand” said Harry, rubbing his temples vigorously.  
Hermione sighed.  
“I don't know what else to say, Harry” she replied patiently. “Even Dumbledore couldn't help us”.  
“I don't mean about the connection” he said, his eyes not meeting hers, “I mean, why did you leave?”  
“Have you not listened to a word I have said?” she answered incredulously.  
“I've been listening all afternoon, 'Mione” he replied, “And I know there's something you're not telling me”.  
Hermione felt her face get hot and got up abruptly, hiding herself from Harry's piercing gaze.  
“You love him” he said, realisation dawning across his face.  
“What utter nonsense!” spat Hermione. “I love Ron, we're going to get married and live happily ever and no curse, connection or charm is going to change that!”  
“Look me in the eye and tell me that” Harry challenged.  
Hermione turned slowly to face him, her expression unreadable.  
“Please, Harry” she whispered. “Just let it go. For me?”  
Harry sighed and nodded once. Hermione gave him a small, grateful smile in return, but she knew that his silence was only temporary. Soon he would want the truth and that meant admitting her true feelings to him and more importantly, to herself.


	23. Sensibus Incomprehensibilis (Incomprehensible feelings)

Severus spent most of the day in his lab brewing various different healing potions for Poppy Pomfrey's supply cabinet. Whilst he did not expect Granger to linger in his study he had no intention of returning while she was still there. He had luncheon sent up from the kitchens and it was only when the temperature dropped so much that his own breath was visible that he decided to return to his rooms.  
As he entered he was momentarily taken aback at the immaculate tidiness of the room. Pippy was a reasonable house-elf but if truth be told she never managed to get it quite right. He glanced at the bookcase and was astonished once more at the perfect organisation of it all. Every book, ledger and journal was perfectly catalogued in the way he liked and all the loose parchments that had last night be strewn across the floor were neatly rolled and stacked on the bottom shelf. He turned his attention to the rest of the room and noted that the green velvet chaise had been transfigured back to its original state and his blanket folded. Even the coal scuttle had been refilled, something Pippy was always forgetting to do.  
“Pippy?” called Severus.  
There was a crack and the little house-elf appeared on the hearth rug.  
“Yes, Master Snape, sir?” said Pippy, her ears bobbing as she curtseyed.  
“I wish to erm.. merely congratulate you on the excellent work you have done here today, Pippy” Severus replied, “And to enquire about Miss Granger”.  
“Thanks you kindly, Master Snape, Sir, but I is not doing anything” Pippy stated honestly. “I is waiting and waiting for Miss Granger to call, so as I can be making her breakfast, but Miss Granger doesn't call! Not even for a pot of tea, Sir!”  
Severus narrowed his eyes.   
“You mean to say, Pippy, that Miss Granger is responsible for all this?” he questioned, waving a hand about the room.  
Pippy's face fell.   
“Please, Master Snape, Sir,” the elf pleaded, “Pippy would have done it sir, but Miss Granger was sleeping when Pippy first checked and, and Pippy didn't want to wake her!”  
“It's fine, Pippy” snapped Severus impatiently.  
“And then when Pippy returned again everything was clean and tidy and Miss Granger was gone sir!” the elf ploughed on relentlessly.  
“I said it's fine, Pippy” Severus sighed. “You may go”.  
“But...but...”  
“You may go, Pippy” Severus repeated, struggling to hide his impatience.  
Pippy nodded, curtseyed and with a loud crack, she was gone.

Severus surveyed the room closely. Everything was exactly where it would have been had he done it himself. He moved closer to the bookcase, his fingertips brushing over the many spines. The room felt different, warmer somehow. He thought back to the previous night and how it had actually been quite pleasant to have company. For many, Hogwarts was a place of family and camaraderie, a place to belong. For him, Hogwarts had always been a lonely place. He belonged, yes, it was the one place where he had always felt truly comfortable but that didn't stop the loneliness.  
Last night though, he had felt normal. Miss Granger had proved very easy to be with and it surprised him how many similarities there were between them. He must arrange another meeting, they had lots to discuss. His eyes wandered to the window expectantly, it would be a treat to see Grangers beautiful owl again, he must remember to ask the creatures name and top up his supply of owl treats next time he was in Hogsmeade.  
He smiled to himself (a rare occurrence admittedly) and approached the bureau in search of Firewhiskey. As he crossed the room he noticed something in the corner by the sofa. He bent down and picked up the crumpled parchment. He opened it up to see his own untidy scrawl.  
Confusion washed over him. What did it mean? He had thought last night that they were united in their thoughts. She had agreed to try! Had she changed her mind? Bewilderment changed to anger and his fist tightened around the parchment scrunching it back up into a tight ball.  
A sudden light in the middle of the room distracted him, the glowing cat patronus prowled across the carpet and stared up at him. Professor McGonagall's voice rang out eerily, 'My office, now'.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus arrived at the headmistress’s office a few minutes later. He lifted his hand to knock on the door and realised his fist was still clenched around the parchment. Pocketing it in his robes, he rapped once onto solid oak and waited.  
“Come in!” called McGonagall, her voice harsh and somewhat high-pitched.  
Severus enter warily, McGonagall in a bad mood was not a good omen.  
“Severus” she greeted, tight-lipped.  
“Minerva” he replied. “Is there a problem?”  
“There most certainly is a problem” she confirmed. “A problem that you will rectify immediately I hope!”  
“I do think you should invite the man to sit down before you interrogate him” came the calm and somewhat amused voice from the portrait above the fireplace.  
“I do not think this is the time for humour or niceties, Albus” barked McGonagall.  
“It appears that I have committed some indiscretion” Severus stated flatly, “Perhaps one of you would care to explain what it is I have meant to have done?”  
“Miss Granger has decided to leave us, Severus” informed Dumbledore.  
“And I wonder whose fault that would be” McGonagall piped up.  
“Minerva, please” the portrait of Dumbledore said, gently. “That isn't helping”.  
“Then I think it better I leave it to you, Albus” she said, rising from her chair.  
She looked at Severus with an expression usually reserved only for Slytherin students and marched out of her office.  
“Sit down dear friend” said Dumbledore “And we shall discuss this latest incident in a civilised manner”.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“Albus, I just do not understand!” said Severus despairingly. “We met, we discussed things, we decided to try and work with the connection!”  
“Severus, I do not wish to be unkind” said Dumbledore carefully, “But you are not an openly emotional man.”  
“What does emotion have to do with anything?” Severus sighed.  
“Quite literally it has everything to do with it” replied the old wizard. “When Miss Granger left your study on Friday evening, how exactly was your relationship left?”  
Severus felt the heat rising in his cheeks and stood immediately, turning away from the watchful portrait.  
“Severus?” questioned Dumbledore, “I think the time has come for absolute truthfulness”.  
Severus stayed standing, his face still hidden from Dumbledore's eyes.  
“Miss Granger did not vacate my study until sometime Saturday” Severus replied, his voice flat and barely audible. “She fell asleep on the sofa, we had worked very late. I left at dawn to allow her some privacy. It was the last time I saw her”.  
“I see...” Dumbledore replied.  
“We did nothing wrong!” exclaimed Severus, turning to face his elder at last.  
“I do not doubt you for a minute, Severus.” said Dumbledore truthfully. “However, I would like to raise that point that if Miss Granger fell asleep, am I to assume that your discussions were left unfinished?”  
“I left her a note.” Severus heard the embarrassment in his own voice.  
“May I ask what the contents of this note were?” Dumbledore questioned.  
Severus slowly removed the crumpled parchment from his pocket, trying to ignore the knowing expression boring down at him. He smoothed it out carefully and held it high enough for Dumbledore to read it from his frame.  
The few short moments of silence felt like an eternity. Eventually Dumbledore acknowledged that he was finished and requested Severus to sit once more.  
“Severus” began Dumbledore, “We have been friends for a long time, I wish to speak candidly and without interruption. Will you allow me that?”  
Severus sighed, nodded and turned his face again to the portrait above the fireplace.  
“You promised Miss Granger that you would try and work with the Coniunctis Animis. For her that meant formulating a relationship with you, a friendship, maybe even something more. She, in her youth perhaps, thought that you felt the same. The letter you left her was cold and clinical, asking her to continue as normal and respect you as a teacher and not as an equal. It is my opinion that the only person truly dealing with this situation is, in fact, Miss Granger and unless you open your mind and your heart I fear there may be terrible consequences ahead for the both of you. Magic of the heart is incredibly powerful. You know this, though you refuse to admit it. Have you even given a moment’s thought to what may happen to you both if you choose to brush this connection under the carpet? Miss Granger has already suffered physical harm through your actions. This is not over just because you choose it to be. I believe you have a few options open to you. You can, as you have been doing, try to carry on regardless. I think that could be very damaging, possibly even dangerous. You could try and maintain a friendship, a mutual understanding as it were. You may even consider taking Miss Granger on as an apprentice. Perhaps a working relationship would suffice. Or..”  
The devastation in Severus' face was enough to make Dumbledore pause.  
“I think that I have said enough for now,” the old wizard continued. “I suggest you retire to your rooms and do a great deal of thinking”.  
Severus stood in silence, his face paler than ever. He nodded in acknowledgment to Dumbledore and walked slowly out of the room like a criminal headed for the gallows.


	24. Absque Vita (A life apart)

In the weeks that followed, both Hermione and Severus attempted to build a life away from each other.  
Severus threw himself into his work, ate only in his room and snapped at his students with such ferocity that even the Slytherins were wary.  
Hermione spent most of her time in the kitchen at Grimmauld Place scouring the Daily Prophet for work and accommodation. Harry didn't press her for more information though she knew it wouldn't be long before he could hold his tongue no longer.  
Severus became more and more withdrawn and his pallid complexion grew paler by the day. He refused to speak to Dumbledore and even Poppy Pomfrey, his closest companion, was pushed away when she tried to talk to him.   
Hermione spoke so rarely that when she did her voice sounded strange and unnatural. She ate very little, despite Kreacher's best efforts, and began to lose weight in such an alarming rate that Harry feared for her health.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Exactly one month after Miss Granger's departure from Hogwarts, Poppy Pomfrey decided to take matters into her own hands.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Exactly one month after her arrival to Grimmauld Place, Harry decided to take matters into his own hands.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It was early Saturday evening when Poppy hammered on Severus' door.   
“What is the meaning of this?” bellowed his harsh voice from inside.  
“20 points from..” but he broke off suddenly as he flung open the door and saw the Matron's amused face.  
“Good evening, dearest Severus” she greeted warmly.  
“Poppy” he replied with a sigh, “I'm afraid I am rather busy...”  
“Do not even think about turning me away, young man” interrupted Poppy.  
From her apron pocket she produced a large, somewhat dusty, bottle.  
“Are you really going to refuse a 100 year old Gideon Brewitt Firewhiskey?”  
Severus sighed again and opened the door fully. He followed Poppy into the living room and summoned two goblets with a lazy flick of his wrist.  
Poppy filled them both and made herself comfortable in the fireside chair.  
Severus rolled his eyes and sat down. It was going to be a long night.  
Poppy drained her glass with the skill of an old Warlock, placed the goblet on the table and stared at her friend.  
“Now then, Severus” she began “We have been friends for longer than I care to remember, we've had our ups and downs but I have always been honest with you. You look dreadful”.  
“Is that level of honesty really necessary?” Severus drawled.  
"You and I both know that this cannot continue" Poppy said gently. "You are suffering, Severus, physically and mentally, and if you are then I am positive that Hermione feels the same".  
"As I am constantly being reminded, Poppy," Severus sneered " Miss Granger is of-age and therefore perfectly capable of understanding what is required of her! "  
"This is not an end-of-year exam that the poor girl needs to pass!" the matron admonished,  
“She is not potion that you can mix to perfection, she is a young woman, Severus, with her whole life ahead of her!”  
“Don’t you think I know that!” Severus snapped. He rose angrily from the chair and began pacing up and down the small room.   
“Why do you think I want this done with? Do you know how many books we pored over the other evening? How many potions and charms we researched? What benefit am I to such a gifted, strong, beautiful…” Severus broke off as he noticed the beaming smile on the old matron’s face.  
“You love her” she stated smugly.  
“How dare you?” he seethed.  
“You love her, Severus” Poppy replied gently, “It’s as plain as the nose on your face. And now you have realised that, what are you going to do about it?”  
Severus Snape stood there, silently staring into Poppy’s kind face, his own face whiter than ever and his hands trembling.  
‘Exactly’, he thought to himself wryly. ‘What in the name of Merlin am I going to do about it….’

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It was early Saturday evening when an elegant peacock patronus appeared on Professor McGonagall’s office carpet.  
‘Floo connection authorisation required from 12 Grimmauld Place to the Headmistresses office, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, for Mr H. Potter’ stated the somewhat pompous voice of Percy Weasley. ‘Status, urgent’.  
Minerva McGonagall stood up as the patronus faded away and with a dramatic swish of her wand, sent her own shimmering cat off into the ether.  
A mere fifteen minutes later, Harry Potter tumbled out of the fireplace and onto the rug.  
“Good to see you, Potter” Minerva welcomed warmly, “Am I correct in thinking that your urgent meeting with me is in regard to Miss Granger and Professor Snape?”  
“It certainly is, Professor” said Harry rather brusquely.  
“Sit down, Potter” Minerva said with a sigh and conjured up a bottle of meade and two goblets from the cabinet in the corner.  
“I didn’t mean to sound so rude, Professor” Harry apologised after a swig of mead. “I just don’t know what to do about Hermione! She won’t eat, she won’t talk to me and it’s all because of that greasy, hooked-nose…”  
“Potter!” admonished the Headmistress, “I will not have you speak about a member of staff like that in this office. I appreciate your concerns and, quite rightly, something must be done, but please control your tongue”.  
“Sorry, Professor” mumbled Harry in apology again.   
Minerva sighed and rubbed a hand across her weary face.   
“I know it is in your instinct to protect Miss Granger” she said calmly, “But this is not something that either of us, or anyone else for that matter, can meddle in. It must be sorted out purely by the people involved”.  
“But she loves him, Professor” Harry replied, with an exasperated shake of his head.  
Minerva glanced up at the portrait above the fireplace just as the supposedly-sleeping Dumbledore allowed himself a small smirk.  
“There is maybe one thing we could do to help” the Headmistress said, a plan forming quickly in her mind. “If you are willing, Mr Potter?”  
“Anything” replied Harry, firmly.  
“Then let us finish our meade and see if we can’t just nudge our respective friends in the right direction”.


	25. Modo Sera (A moment too late)

“Come on, ’Mione” Harry pleaded. “It will be fun, I promise”.  
“Oh, Harry, why can’t you just go without me” Hermione replied tetchily. “I really do have a lot to do here”.  
“Hermione give me a break” said Harry with a sigh. “You’ve circled that advert so many times your quill’s made a hole in the paper!”  
Hermione glanced down at the Daily Prophet she had been reading. She had circled the job advertisement so absent-mindedly that she had in fact torn right through the page.  
“Ok, fine!” she agreed, her teeth clenched, “But why the Three Broomsticks? What’s wrong with Diagon Alley?”  
“It just seemed right, you know?” said Harry, casually turning away so she wouldn’t see his face as he continued to lie. “A few drinks with old friends in Hogsmeade, I just thought after everything everyone has been through…” he trailed off, feeling awful about playing on his friend’s emotions.  
“Yes, of course” Hermione replied, blushing. “Er, will Ron be there?”  
“No, erm, he’s got a training course that day” Harry lied again.  
“OK” said Hermione, her stiff shoulders visibly relaxing. “I’ll be there”.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“I really do not think this fuss is necessary, Poppy” said Severus Snape through gritted teeth.  
“It is high time that you began to build bridges with your fellow professors, Severus” replied Poppy. “Goodness knows they have tried on many occasions to apologise to you and make amends”.  
“I don’t need their apologies” said Severus stiffly.  
“Well, I need a night out” huffed Poppy, “And you will be my escort”.  
“Escort?” snorted Severus. “I sure Slughorn would be honoured to assume the role”.  
Poppy pursed her lips and stuck her hands on her hips so violently that she wobbled.  
Severus allowed himself a small smile for what seemed like the first time in months.  
“I would be delighted to escort you, Madame Pomfrey” he said sardonically, bowing his head in a most regal fashion.  
Poppy gave a triumphant ‘hmph’ and waltzed out of the room.  
“Oh, and Severus, dear”, she called as an afterthought, “Do wash your hair and clean your robes”.  
Severus stared through the open doorway with a look of despair and just a tiny hint of amusement.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione looked in the mirror and was appalled at the face that looked back at her. It was no wonder Harry had been so concerned. Her face was so pale there was an unsightly greyish quality to it. She had dark shadows under her eyes and her cheekbones were so prominent they looked like they had suffered an engorgement charm. Her hair was lank and dull and as her eyes travelled downward she saw that her once fitted clothes were literally hanging off her. She sighed and rubbed gently at her temples. She had truly thought that running away from Hogwarts had been the right thing to do but it seemed the further away she was from, from him (she couldn’t even bear to think his name), the worse she felt. He plagued her dreams every night and every time she closed her eyes she saw his cold, icy glare, plunging her into depths of darkness she had never experienced. Not even during the war. Maybe Harry was right. A night out with good friends could be just what she needed. She groaned as she saw her reflection once again. There was no way she could face people like this! She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders and reached for her wand…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus looked in the mirror and sighed. He couldn’t believe he had agreed to accompany Poppy this evening. It was bad enough seeing the apologetic (and still often wary) glances of his fellow professors during school hours without having to face them on the weekend as well! Poppy knew how he disliked socialising. The mask he had worn for so long seemed now to be his own true self, in fact it was hard for him to remember a time where his life wasn’t full of secrets and lies and deceit. Was he ever really himself? He cast his mind back, searching for a time when he could remember being truly happy. He suddenly wished he hadn’t. The evening he had spent with, with her (he would not even think her name), had been the most pleasant evening he had had in years. No matter how vigorously he threw himself into his work, she still assaulted his dreams. Her hurt, tear-stained face haunted him every time he closed his eyes and the mere thought of her made his chest constrict so tightly he thought at times he might die. He looked again into his own pallid reflection and shook his head. ‘What in the name of Merlin could she possibly see in me?’ he thought sadly. His looked at his greasy hair hanging limply down his face, his cold, steel eyes and his thin, sneering lips. He had more lines than he remembered, and his skin was so colourless that it resembled a piece of blank parchment. Maybe Poppy was right. He couldn’t go on like this. Ignoring the doubt that was beginning to bubble up in his stomach, Severus Snape took one last glance into the mirror and headed promptly to the bathroom…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

An hour and countless charms later, Hermione re-examined her appearance in the mirror. Her hair was clean, soft and shiny, her make-up was light but elegant and her jeans and blouse fitted her snugly thanks to some complicated wand-work. She smiled into the mirror, though she noted that it never quite reached her eyes, picked up her beaded bag and headed for the door.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus entered the hospital wing in a somewhat uncomfortable manner. The scent of his freshly-washed hair aggravated his nose as it swung softly around his face and his emerald green robes lacked the swish of his traditional school attire. He was just about to turn and scurry back to his room when Poppy’s loud gasp stopped him in his tracks.  
“Well, well, well” said the medi-witch, raising her eyebrows. “You scrub up rather well”.  
“I take it you approve?” Severus drawled.  
“Indeed, I do” Poppy replied, walking towards him, her own robes of deepest blue flowing gracefully with each step.  
He offered her his arm politely and together they made their way out of the castle and into the night air.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione apparated to the very edge of Hogsmeade, feeling she would like to walk alone to compose herself before he met up Harry and the others in the Three Broomsticks. The little village was relatively quiet now that the shops has closed for the day and she rather liked the peace and quiet as she made her way along the path. It felt strange being so close to Hogwarts and to ‘him’ after all this time. Tears prickled in her eyes, but she ignored the emotions rising up inside her. Tonight was about being with friends and having fun and she would do her damnedest not to waste one more second thinking about that man.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

As they entered the Three Broomsticks, Severus winced as heads turned towards them and conversation halted. Poppy squeezed his arm reassuringly and marched them towards the bar. Goblets of meade in hand, they found a table in a cosy corner and sat down. Poppy chattered on cheerfully, but Severus heard little of what she said. His mind was imagining what it would be like to sit here with a certain Gryffindor, discussing his latest potion or the book she was reading. So engrossed he was in his daydream that he jumped when Poppy's hand tapped his arm.  
"Just off to the little witch's room" she whispered before standing up and heading away from the table.  
A few moments later his thoughts were interrupted once again. He looked up into the eyes of Madam Rosmerta who was looking rather nervous.  
Gingerly she handed him a piece of folded parchment and said "Just don't hex the messenger!" before swiftly returning to the bar.  
Severus unfolded the parchment, his expression turning from bewilderment to anger as he read the note...

'Dearest Severus,  
Please forgive me but I am only doing what I can to be your friend. If all has gone to plan, Miss Granger will be arriving any moment now. You two need to talk! Keep your head and follow your heart.  
Your friend,  
Poppy x' 

Never had Severus thought it possible to feel so many emotions at the same time. He was angry, he felt betrayed and humiliated, but he was also apprehensive and unbelievably excited. Hermione was coming here, to see him. This may be his one and only chance to put things right. He took a long sip of meade and turned his head expectantly towards the door.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hermione stood outside the Three Broomsticks listening to the sounds of merriment coming from inside. She was imagining what it would be like to visit here with a certain ex-potions master. She smiled as she pictured them discussing an article in the Daily Prophet or making plans for Christmas at Hogwarts. She was so lost in her daydream that she didn't notice the tall figure creeping up behind her until she felt his gloved hand press tightly over her mouth. In a panic she dropped her bag and reached into her pocket for her wand, but her attacker was quicker. He knocked the wand from her hand with such force that white-hot pain shot through her arm. Her cries were muffled by his hand and as she tried to escape she felt the unmistakable point of a wand tip pressed against her throat.  
"Now, now, Granger" a rasping voice whispered in her ear, "Be a good girl and this will all be over soon".  
Silent tears rolled down her cheeks as her assailant began to turn.  
In the blink of an eye she was gone, her beaded bag and wand the only proof that she had ever been there at all...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus sat at the table, his eyes fixed on the doorway getting more and more anxious with each passing moment. Feeling the need for some courage he raised the goblet of meade to his lips when a sudden burst of white-hot pain came coursing down his arm. The goblet crashed to the floor and he leapt up from his chair in shock. Ignoring the surprised looks from the other patrons he steadied himself against the wall.   
'What in the name of Merlin is going on?' he thought.  
He tried to calm down, but his breathing was becoming quick and shallow like he was suffocating. Summoning up as much strength as he could, he stumbled through the tavern towards the door in search of fresh air. He burst into the night sweating and visibly shaking. As he tried to regain his composure he noticed a small bundle on the path, it's fabric glistening in the tavern lights. He looked around, but the village seemed quite deserted and as he bent down to retrieve it he saw the unmistakable shape of a wand sticking out from behind a large stone. His heart thud heavily in his chest, wands were not just discarded like rubbish, something was very wrong here. He closed his eyes and let his other senses take over. He could feel the remnants of dark magic in the air, taste its bitterness on his tongue. His eyes snapped open and he hurried over to pick up the wand. As his hand reached tentatively towards it, realisation hit him like a bludger. His solitary scream echoed into the night as he dropped in agony to his knees.  
"Hermione!"


	26. Tam Procul… (So far apart…)

The headmistress’s office was a hive of activity. Everyone was talking over each other, people were pacing, there were shouts and tears and an overwhelming feeling of dread.  
Severus' collapse in Hogsmeade had resulted in the patrons of the Three Broomsticks promptly spilling out onto the street and in an instant, rumours of illegal curses, dark magic and even Voldemort's return from the dead were flying about. Only Rosmerta had kept her head, quickly sending word to Hogwarts which resulted in Minerva and Poppy's immediate arrival.   
Poppy had healed his broken wrist in a trice and after she had forced a calming potion down his throat, he had been able to tell the two anxious witches what had happened. After that, everything had happened extremely quickly. The Ministry had been contacted as had Potter and the Weasley's. Of course, given the situation, everyone in the room was now fully aware of the predicament surrounding Severus and Hermione. Minerva had explained it all to the astonished crowd though he had been thankful that she had kept the details to the bare minimum.  
It had not gone down well. Ronald Weasley had launched himself at him, Ginny had tried to stop her brother with a poorly aimed bat-bogey hex which had hit her mother and it wasn't until the portrait of Albus Dumbledore bellowed for quiet that things began to calm down. Ron was now in a corner, red-eared and arguing with Harry. Ginny was being comforted by her (now hex-free) mother and Minerva was deep in conversation with Albus, Kingsley Shacklebolt and Arthur Weasley. It was therefore only Poppy Pomfrey who noticed him arise from his chair in the corner and slip quietly away....  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Hermione came to in a dank and musty room. Her right arm was burning, and she was sure her wrist was broken. She felt disoriented and tried to stand before she realised she was bound to a chair. In that instant, all the stress and strain she had been holding inside for so long burst out. Violent sobs shook her delicate frame and the tears rolled down her face in a torrent. All the grief from the war, the abandonment of her parents and her feelings for Severus came pouring out of her for the first time. She didn't want to be brave anymore, she didn't want to be strong or clever, she didn't want to fight. She wanted someone to save her for a change. She thought of Severus and all that he had been through in his life. Had he always felt brave? Had he ever wished for someone to rescue him? She wondered what had happened after she had been kidnapped. Would Harry have even realised anything was wrong? Would he have thought she had merely changed her mind? She’d made it quite clear that she hadn't really wanted to go to Hogsmeade. How long would it be before anyone even noticed she was missing? Eventually her tears stopped, and she felt a sudden determination rising up through her body.   
'I am Hermione Granger' she told herself firmly, 'I've destroyed Horcruxes and I helped defeat the greatest dark wizard of all time and if I need to fight again, then by Merlin, I will!'  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
In the peace and calmness of his private room, Severus quickly changed into sturdy black travelling robes and began packing a bag with various vials, bandages, blankets, a pocket knife and compass. A silent incantation shrunk the large duffel down to a tiny pouch that he hung around his neck. He tucked both his and Hermione's wands inside his robes and tied his hair at the nape of his neck with a piece of black cord. How had he let this happen? If it wasn't for his own pig-headedness Hermione would still be safely at Hogwarts, tucked in a corner of the library, nose in a book, without a care in the world.  
'I will find her' he told himself firmly, 'if it is the last thing I do'.  
And in a swish of black he was gone.  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
The door in the corner of Hermione's prison creaked opened and a tall, thin man entered. He was dressed all in black, his hands were gloved, and a hood obscured most of his face. She noticed that he walked with a limp and as he stumbled closer to her, she could smell stale alcohol and tobacco. He stopped right in front of her and threw back his hood. She let out an audible gasp as she took in his heavily scarred face. He reminded her a little of Mad-Eye Moody, but his eyes were dangerous, and she could see him sneering behind the thick, tatty beard. Even through the scars she recognised him. She had seen his wanted poster in Diagon Alley, one of the few remaining death eaters that had, so far, eluded capture.  
Augustus Rookwood!  
"So, Granger" he slurred, "this can all be solved pretty simply. You get Potter to bring me the Elder wand and I let you go".  
"But, the Elder wand is gone!" choked Hermione.   
"Do not lie to me, Mudblood!" Rockwood shouted. "It's common knowledge that Potter defeated the Dark Lord with the Elder wand. It's also common knowledge that Potter would do anything for his little mudblood friend. Why else do you think I've kept you alive?"  
Hermione's brain went into overdrive. Rookwood wanted something that no longer existed. Without his prize her would surely kill her there and then. She would be relatively safe if Rookwood believed the Elder wand was in his grasp and although she knew he was bound to kill her after she needed to buy herself some time to formulate a plan of escape.  
"Ok" she said, "The Elder wand isn't exactly gone, but Harry Potter doesn't have it".  
"You lie!"  
"It's true!" she answered quickly. "Harry didn't want the responsibility of the Elder wand. So, he, he gave it to someone else”.  
"Who?" demanded Rookwood, his face so close to hers she could see the spittle on his lips.  
"Professor Snape".  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Severus was in Knockturn Alley. Though the whole of the Wizarding world was aware of his part in the fall of the Dark Lord, he was still feared and revered by much of the community. His interrogations of the hags and vampires and other undesirables that frequented the dirty backstreets of Diagon Alley had, however, proved fruitless. No one saw, heard or knew anything and no one was talking. All around him the faces of wizards who were once his fellow death eaters, glared down at him from their wanted posters. Although the new Ministry, under the control of Shacklebolt, had rounded up the majority of the Dark Lord's followers immediately after the battle of Hogwarts, there were still some in hiding. He looked again into the faces of Lucius Malfoy, Fenrir Greyback and Augustus Rookwood. Dangerous men all three of them, but what would they want with Hermione Granger? It made no sense! Maybe it was a random attack, there were always going to be those who were prejudiced against muggle-borns, even the war wouldn’t change that completely. The image of her laying, broken, in Malfoy Manor once again flooded his mind.   
‘Dammit, Snape, this isn’t helping!’ he scolded himself.  
He lent up against the wall and pressed his knuckles against his forehead. He thought back to his death eater days when communication was as easy as pressing a wand-tip to the dark mark that still remained, albeit faded, on his left arm. Instinctively, his hand reached up to the amulet around his neck. As his fingers clasped around it a warmth spread throughout his entire body. In that moment, he knew exactly what to do. He closed his eyes, amulet in hand and began to turn…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
“How to you expect me to write with a broken wrist?” Hermione sobbed.   
Quill in hand, the pain was unbearable as Rookwood stood over her, his wand pressed in to her back.  
“For the love of Merlin!” spat Rookwood.  
He grabbed her broken wrist, causing her to cry out in pain once more, and flicked his wand angrily. She felt the bones mend noisily and fire shot up to her shoulder. It was excruciating, but at least her wrist was mended.  
“Don’t try anything clever, girlie” said Rookwood menacingly. “Don’t be putting any secrets messages in there, we wouldn’t want my wand to slip across that pretty little throat of yours, now would we?”  
Hermione wrote as calmly as she could, praying that Severus would understand what Rookwood would not. The quill trembled in her hand and her breathing was ragged as she hoped and prayed that her plan would work.  
“Now, that wasn’t so hard was it?” the death eater sneered.   
He snatched the parchment from her the moment she was finished and with a dramatic wave of his wand, she was once again bound tightly to the chair.  
“Now we wait” he said and turned on his heel and out of the room.  
‘Now we wait’ Hermione agreed.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Severus opened his eyes and was shocked to find that the amulet had brought him straight back to his own private study. Such was his surprise he didn’t even contemplate the power of the charm that had broken through the apparition shield around the castle.  
“Curses!” he shouted aloud and slumped down into the fireside chair.  
A split-second later an urgent tapping could be heard at his window. Rushing over he threw it open and a rather vicious looking owl flew in and landed on the arm of the sofa.  
He ripped the note from the owl’s leg and it flew off into the night without a backward glance. Hands trembling, he took a deep breath and unfolded the parchment..

‘Dear Professor Snape,

You must bring the Elder wand to the old barn at the edge of the village of Amesbury, Wiltshire.  
Do not contact the Ministry or tell anyone about this.  
My life depends on you.

Sincerely,  
Hermione J. Granger’

Severus Snape’s world came crashing down around him.   
In a fit of rage, he picked up a paperweight from the desk and flung it across the room. He grabbed book after book from the shelves, spinning about the room like a tornado. The desk was overturned, bottles smashed, even the drapes were ripped from the windows in his despair. Broken, he fell to the floor, tears streaming down his enraged face. He had felt pain like this only once before. Many years ago, when he had cradled Lily’s lifeless body in his arms at Godric’s Hollow. He had thought then that life could never get any worse. He was wrong. Sobs racked his body as he tried desperately to pull himself together. He grabbed at the amulet and tore it from his neck, flinging it angrily against the wall. As it fell to the floor, the casing split open, and a bright light suddenly filled the entire room. He shielded his eyes but seconds later the light began to dim. As he slowly lowered his arm he witnessed an ethereal figure rising up out of the amulet itself.  
“Severus” whispered the glowing figure.  
He clutched at his chest. His throat so tight his voice was barely audible when he replied, “Mother?”  
“Save her” she pleaded. And as quickly as she appeared, she was gone.  
Severus was on his feet in an instant, frantically searching through the mess to find the ransom note. His hand darted under the bureau to retrieve it and as he re-read it, one particular line seemed to jump out at him…  
‘My life depends on you’  
Hermione had not ‘my life depends on it’ which would seem much more appropriate. Her life depended on him. She had put her trust in him to save her. Which ever death eater scum had taken her, he had clearly assumed that Potter’s destruction of the Elder wand was a lie. She must have told her kidnapper that it was he, Severus Snape, who was the current owner of the fabled wand. Even with her life hanging in the balance she was still able to use her logic and remain calm enough to go to him for help. Merlin, he even knew she was truly still alive because of her clever reference to their personal connection! He had no doubt that this was indeed written by her hand and now all that remained was for him to go and get her. He would save her and when he did he would never let her go, ever again.


	27. Tuta sinu (Safe in my arms)

Hermione was unaware how long she had been in the barn. After taking the letter from her, Rookwood had not returned. She assumed he was on guard just outside the door and as she was wandless, she did not risk trying to escape. She knew there was a strong chance she would die here. Even if Severus did come for her, she could not help him or even protect herself. Her heart ached with guilt as she thought of the danger she was putting him in. She did not know if there were others outside with Rookwood and she felt sick at the thought of her beloved professor walking straight into an ambush. If they were both lucky enough to survive, she knew she would do whatever was necessary to keep him safe. She would do what he had asked of her. She would return to Hogwarts and be the perfect student. She would treat him in the same manner as all her other professors and let him get on with his life. She would love him in secret and that would be enough. It would have to be. Having him in her life, even just as her professor, would be better than nothing and maybe, after her NEWTS, she could persuade Professor McGonagall to give her a job at Hogwarts. She would become his colleague and maybe in time, his friend. She would hold onto that thought until they were both safe. She closed her eyes and allowed herself one final daydream…

Across the grounds they walked, hand in hand, their feet leaving footprints in the newly fallen snow. The lights burned bright in the castle windows and the sounds of carolling filtered softly out of the Great Hall. Suddenly he stopped and turned her towards him. He tucked a loose tendril of her hair behind her ear and cupped her chin with his hand, gently lifting her face to his as he bent down to kiss her. Even in the winter’s night his lips felt warm as they brushed hers. His gentleness never ceased to amaze her, even after all these years and as their kiss broke and they continued walking she looked down at the diamond on her left hand that sparkled so beautifully in the moonlight…

Her dreamed was suddenly broken by the sounds of a jubilant shout from just outside the door…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Severus could see the barn that lay just at the end of the lane. A faint light could be seen coming from a dusty side window, but the surrounding area was in complete darkness. At that moment, the moon came out from behind a cloud, flooding the lane with light. He saw a figure in black leaning up against the barn door. Even from this distance he recognised him. Rookwood. A ruthless combatant, Rookwood would not hesitate to kill Hermione if his plan went wrong. He was loathe to admit it, but he was glad that he was not here alone. The more protection for Hermione the better. Plans had been made hastily in the headmistress’s office under the watchful eye of Albus Dumbledore. Unbeknownst to Rookwood they now had the barn surrounded, though it did seem as though Rookwood was working alone. It was likely that he would have to face the death eater unarmed. He only hoped that his fellow rescuers had a good aim. He took a deep breath and, hands raised, stepped out into the moonlight…  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
From his position at the barn door, Rookwood saw Snape the moment he stepped onto the lane. He looked around for signs of others and let out a rasping laugh as he saw that he was quite alone.   
“So, here comes the great Professor Snape” he jeered, “Come to save the filthy, mudblood student!”   
Severus seethed but bit his tongue and continued walking slowly towards the barn.   
“I have what you asked for, Rookwood” Severus called, calmly. “Now let the girl go”.   
“Not ‘til I have the wand” Rookwood replied. “I need you unarmed, too”.   
“As you wish” Severus replied, reaching slowly into his robe and raising his wand out in front of him.   
“Put it on the floor and walk away from it” snapped Rookwood, a hint of nervousness in his voice.   
“You wish to see the Elder wand?” Severus asked politely, his voice unquavering as he reached closer and closer to the barn.   
“Put it on there” said Rookwood, gesturing to an old tree stump to the left of him. Severus removed a cloth bundle from inside his robes and placed it carefully on the stump.   
“Open it” said Rookwood, his eyes glinting wildly.   
“Not until I see the girl” Severus replied, his authoritative command wiping the smile from Rookwood’s face.   
“In there” said the death eater nodding his head towards the barn door.   
Severus raced inside, instantly removing Hermione’s wand from his robes and enveloping the inside of the barn in the strongest shield charm known to wizard-kind. The moment he was safely inside the barn, a hail of spells rained down on the unsuspecting Rookwood. He could hear the shouts of Potter and Minerva and the rest of his team but the instant that he saw her, the rest of the world melted away. Rushing to her he used her own wand once again to remove the ropes that bound her to the chair. He scooped her up into his arms and buried his face in her soft hair, inhaling her delicious scent. With a ferociousness that shocked him he lifted his face to hers and kissed her with a passion he had not known he was capable of. Suddenly he felt her arms tighten around his neck. Merlin! She was kissing him back! He could feel the hunger in her lips and her hot tears on his face. He never, ever wanted this to end but he knew must speak to her before things went too far. He placed her gently on her feet, holding her shoulders to steady her and spoke in a voice that trembled so much, he hardly recognised it as his own.   
“Hermione, are you ok?”   
“I am now” she replied giddily.   
“I mean are you injured at all” he said, exasperated. “Did he hurt you at all?”   
“He broke my wrist, but he, he mended it” she gasped. “It hurts but I’m ok, honestly”.  
“Oh, thank Merlin!” he sighed. “I don’t know how I would have lived if something had happened to you”.   
Hermione stared at him, her eyes wide, her bottom lip tucked between her teeth. “Severus?” she questioned, breathlessly. “Do you really mean that?”   
Severus looked straight back into her beautiful, tear-stained face and said softly “My life depends on you”.


	28. Epilogue - In saecula saeculorum (Always and forever)

Sunday, May 2nd, 1999  
Hermione stood in front of the mirror as Ginny carefully weaved the elegant goblin-made combs into her hair. Once belonging to Eileen Prince, they had arrived this morning with a note that read, simply;   
‘My life depends on you x’   
She was so glad that she had remained friends with the feisty red-head, who looked amazing in a gown of shimmering silver.   
“Harry will have a fit when he sees you in that dress!” she giggled.   
“I bloody hope so!” laughed the youngest Weasley. “It’s about time he made an honest woman of me!”   
“Thank you for doing this, Ginny” Hermione said, sincerely. “I understand that it hasn’t been easy for you”. “Oh, don’t worry about Won-Won” Ginny laughed. “He’ll be on his absolute best behaviour today or I’ll be sending a double-strength bat-bogey hex his way. And this time, I won’t miss!”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Severus stood in front of the mirror as Poppy fussed about, brushing non-existent dust from his robes and dabbing her eyes with a handkerchief every other second.   
“Pull yourself together woman” he said, though not unkindly. “Is it not tradition that I should be the emotional one?”   
“I’m so proud of you Severus” the medi-witch blubbed. “She is lucky to have you”.   
“I think you have that entirely the wrong way around” he drawled with a roll of his eyes.   
He glanced down to the gold muggle watch that adorned his left wrist. His heart had burst with pride this morning when he opened the package that had been so expertly delivered by the majestic Arianrhod. From the card that had accompanied it he had learnt that the watch had belonged to Hermione’s father and it had been the one item from her home that she had taken when she had left them behind. He was so glad that he had convinced her to return their memories. He knew how happy she would be to have them back in her life and though the process of returning one’s memories was a difficult one, he was confident that together, they would accomplish it. Tomorrow they would journey to Australia and he would watch with happiness as she was reunited with her true family.   
“It’s time, Severus” Poppy said, her voice breaking his thoughts.   
He took a deep breath, offered her his arm just like he had that fateful night, and together they headed to the Great Hall.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Severus stood at the front of the Great Hall, his heavy robes of deepest purple trailing elegantly to the floor. To his right stood his dearest friend, Poppy, in delicate lilac robes that complimented his own.  
The bewitched ceiling shone with the light of a thousand stars and the floor was scattered with tiny pink petals. The house tables had been replaced by many dainty white chairs each tied at the back with a shimmering pink bow.  
Almost instantaneously the hall was filled with people chattering excitedly.  
Severus allowed himself a glance towards the very back of the hall. The flame-red hair of the Weasley boy was hard to miss, as was the unruly black mop of Potter as the pair stood side by side in their best dress robes chatting animatedly to Longbottom and Luna Lovegood. The later was attracting so much attention in her short, frilly muggle dress that Longbottom kept grabbing her hand and blushing with pride. As his eyes continued to scan the hall, a lump formed in his throat as he realised just how many of the people here he would now consider his friends. Hermione had swept into his life and turned it upside down and he thanked Merlin everyday that she had. He turned his head to the front just in time to see Kingsley Shacklebolt, in elaborate robes of deep blue and gold, gently wave his wand from behind the golden eagle lectern where Dumbledore used to stand. A string quartet sitting discreetly in one corner began to play and an expectant hush fell over the Great Hall.  
Severus vaguely recognised the music though he did not believe it came from the wizarding world. No, this was muggle music.   
‘This is pure Granger’ he thought with a smile.   
He expectantly turned his head over his shoulder just as the huge oak doors opened majestically. A vision in robes of white and silver entered the hall with the grace of a ballerina. Soft, brown hair cascading over her shoulders, a bouquet of pink roses in her hands. Her muggle veil trailing down her back, his mother’s hair-combs glistening softly in the enchanted starlight. He was, as always, amazed by her cleverness. Both muggle and magical traditions had been expertly woven through the entire ceremony. The muggle-born princess and the half-blood prince, he mused, as proud of their heritage as they were of each other. As she took her place next to him, he reached out for her hand and she gave him a smile that melted his once icy heart.   
They made their vows to each other witnessed by their closest friends, promising to love and cherish even after death.   
As the golden thread swept from the Minister’s wand and bound their hands in a tradition as old as time itself, he knew.   
He was home.


End file.
